The will to live

[Boatsetsailrose]

Thank you for sharing -
For me not having Will to live I now look back and see was to do with grief (re loss of family .. Feeling worthless and shame

Today I don't feel these things v much anymore -
Working a 12 step programme has been central to this
See acoa ( children of alcoholics / dysfunctional families - for meetings -

Having a spiritual life and support and love have been central -

Best wishes to you -

[Rrecovery]

WF - thanks    Has knowing your family history been helpful in overcoming Cptsd?

Hi  Ladybug.  What you said about "fatigue on this level" I so understand.  I want to clarify that therapy has been a HUGE part of my recovery, and I believe that most people can recovery fully this way.  I am unusual in that I do have an unremitting biologically depressed brain chemistry that needs the extra help of an SSRI.

Hi  Boatsetsailrose, I'm glad you don't feel this way anymore.  I'm glad you've found relief through your recovery program.  Spirituality is very important to me too  I had practiced so many positive habits for so long, but could never feel the fruit of those practices, until now.  It's a very wonderful time for me 

This thread has been a blessing!  Thank you to everyone who has read it.  My wish and prayer is that we all might find our way to a true enjoyment of life 

[Boatsetsailrose]

I had some energy healing couple yrs ago and had an experience where I was almost regressed to being born 'I don't want to go there ' I heard myself saying - and then in a louder voice 'I don't want to be here ' 'I don't want to be here ' ' I heard the healer saybut you are here ' and then in the moment an acceptance fell on me and I haven't felt that way as much since

[Widdiful Falling]

I think knowing my family history does help. It makes me feel like there was a precedent set, and I have already broken it, so I feel that is an accomplishment.

It helps me relate to people. I can hear a story about racism and prejudice, and know what the long-term effects are going to be. Same with unprepared pregnancy. In fact, knowing my family history, and how things turned out, has solidified many of my beliefs, and has given me a base on which to rebuild myself.

It does have its downsides, though. Sometimes I get stuck in the past, and because I know what happened in such detail, I can get lost relating things. The past really does repeat itself. If I stopped there, I suppose it would be okay, but there is very much an emotional component, as well. Thinking about it can be very triggering. I have to be mindful, and consciously pull what I need from the past into the present, instead of getting mired in it.