28 and finally awake

[gonelikeyesterday]

I'm new here.
My constant terror for myself has been gone for years. But, somehow, just lately, it seems that my body is catching up? Does this happen? Like there's a time delay. You get so far from your trauma and then - BANG - here's your homework. Is that a thing? Anxiety, fatigue, insomnia, paranoia, all of it. Has anyone heard of that, years after?

[Jdog]

Welcome to our forum, gonelikeyesterday!

I'm sorry that you are feeling so many somatic symptoms all of the sudden.  To answer your question,  it is not at all uncommon for the things you describe to pop up months or years after your thinking brain has processed trauma.  In my own case, it took many years to first realize that I had cptsd and then a few more to really work with my body on things such as anxiety, eating disorders, and now tinnitus. 

Hang in there, and look around the "resources" section for suggestions.  Many of us have gotten a great deal of help from author/therapist Pete Walker's books, and Bessel Vanderkolk has written a book entitled, "The Body Keeps the Score" which is full of interesting ideas.  Peter Levine is another therapist/author with much of interest to contribute here.  And there are others.

You are not alone, and your symptoms are not at all unusual for trauma survivors.  I am glad you found our forum and had the courage to join.  Take care and be gentle with yourself.

[Three Roses]

So glad you're here! I'm 59 and feel like I'm just getting in touch with my past and how I feel about it, so I'm happy to hear you made it at 28! I'm pretty new to this forum but it's been so helpful, everyone's been so kind. So welcome!

[gonelikeyesterday]

Thank you both for being so nice to me. There are so many things about this that seem so overwhelming, people just replying and being kind feels so surprising.

I'm wondering, how did you get a handle on your c-PTSD diagnosis and what it means for you and your life after trauma?

It seems like such a complicated, never ending thing. I have a good life - with amazing people and opportunities. I'm worried that in trying to treat this, I'm going to just...disintigrate. Ruin my current life by dragging up what's past.

[Jdog]

In my case, I self diagnosed after reading lots of online and traditional book sources. My therapist is terrific but wasn't going to label me with anything other than codependence without my own acknowledgment and understanding. And since cptsd isn't officially a diagnosis from the DSM, she can't likely use it in her official notes as an excuse to see patients.  Anyway, my issues came to light with the death of my Mother in 2012 and I continue to work on myself daily.  I currently use a combination of emailing my therapist (she no longer sees patients but doesn't mind my emails), running (it's a huge help -calms me down), meditation, and lots of journaling and positive self talk. 

Long answer to a short question. 

[Three Roses]

After years of being treated for MDD, my last therapist diagnosed me with PTSD. After reading and researching I self-diagnosed as C-PTSD. I just finished Pete Walker's book on it and it (and this forum) have helped further.

You're meant to be here.

[LanaBanana]

Hi and welcome to Out Of The Storm, Gonelikeyesterday! 

You are really not alone in this. In my case, symptoms hit me like a ton of bricks months after an abusive relationship. It's very common for somatic symptoms to emerge some time after a trauma (months or years).
As for a diagnosis of C-PTSD, there isn't an official one yet in the DSM-V (although it's mentioned), but if you are following a therapy, you can bring it up and explore what symptoms you have. Unfortunately, there is no easy way to overcome trauma, and it often involves bringing up the past. I think that having a support system (whether it's a therapist that you trust, friends, or family members) can really help you work through your trauma and somatic symptoms. OOTS also has a community of very supportive people who have C-PTSD and can provide educative material to help with your recovery.

I hope that you'll be able to work through some of your traumas here!  Welcome to the community!