Friday Night Whiskey Blues

[LanaBanana]

Tonight I feel lonely. It's one of those nights when I wish I was out having fun with friends.
I live alone and I have no friends. I've only been in this city for 1 year and a half, and I know no one. On the nights when I feel lonely, I drink whiskey because it reminds me of good times when I felt safe. I miss those times very much, even if they were few and far between in my life.

I like how quiet my apartment is, but on some nights, the silence can feel deafening. On some nights, I'd like to hear some noise, I'd like to feel connected to the world around me, to have fun with people and let go of my anxiety, my fears and worries. But when I'm around people, it's hard not to feel that hollow silence inside of me, that empty feeling that I try so hard to fill.

Tonight,  I'm wearing a green dress and heels, I've got lipstick on, and I've sitting alone drinking whiskey. Tonight, I'm wondering how my life ended up like this and why I seem to always be alone. Tonight, I feel hollow and empty, and I'm trying to fill that void with whiskey.

I'm sorry for the depressing post. Thanks for reading!

[Dutch Uncle]

[The Moon Hare]

Lana I understand about feeling lonely, though I am married.  I am adjusting to the feelings of loneliness and my 2 dogs help me a lot. I have some pretty good conversation with them and they get me out of the apt walking.

I am learning to take care of me and in a strange way that helps me feel less lonely. Is there anything you enjoy doing, indoors or out or how about on-line friends ?

How about a pet would that help  ? I spend a lot of time on my own and having someone who looks at me with love and I believe listens, sure helps me  better (my dogs that is)  if wanted.

[LanaBanana]

Thank you for the reply Moon Hare! 

I try to have a good self-care routine, but sometimes I do end up feeling lonely. Unfortunately, there's not much I can do about it right now (other than write posts on OOTS), but I'm working on it.

Thank you for the post! 

[Contessa]

Hey LanaBanana,
I do the same thing too sometimes. It sucks.
Feeling better at all from Friday?

[LanaBanana]

Thanks Contessa!  Yes I am! I recently discovred some things about my Inner Critic and I think it got better. Still working on my Outer Critic, but I think I'm doing better from Friday!
Thank you for asking