Invalidation is abuse POSSIBLE TRIGGERS

[Satori60]

This was incredibly valuable! I am still reeling from a couple of re-triggering incidents with people who have way too much sense of power and control. A number of the expressions used above were part of their vocabulary that I only now know were caustic and limiting my ability to not get taken down.

It seems the experiences I have had have come from those whom I would identify as NPD, who lack empathy of the current situation and can not see or accept what I am experiencing. By the time I realize what has transpired I am in too deep, almost like a spell has been cast and I am caught, frozen in the messy goo. As writer/psycho-therapist Jeff Brown states in his work - boundaries, boundaries, boundaries!

Preparing myself and anticipating the sign posts that let me know these interactions may/will have consequences if I am not in tune with these hits to a tender psyche (totally depends on my own state of mind and stress levels incurred). Thank you so much for this post. Very helpful

[Hazy111]

This is is the problem with growing up in a PD family. Youll never get validation from them.

Although i have tried over the years especially my uNPD father. If i ever try to bring up my now dead uBPD mother , he refutes to discuss her in anyway negatively or criticise her. He doesnt want anyone to upset his fantasy  and it was a fantasy.

If i press him , its "she was a wonderful mother" " she was disappointed with her  children"  He dissociated all his life and dismisses my pain. He wont recognise the causes. He doesnt want to go there, the problems are mine and nothing to do with my family

Its a pointless exercise , but i still fall into the trap.

[Three Roses]

[Fightsong]

That link to that boundaries article. Gulp, just gulp. That explains so much.