Emotional flashbacks or panic attacks?

[Anxious]

Hi,

For about 5 years I've suffered from what I thought were panic attacks. But I've had severe anxiety problems since I was 12. A while ago, I read about Complex PTSD and it sounded just like me. I'm starting to think that I have emotional flashbacks rather than panic attacks.

My family is dysfunctional and toxic, in my opinion. My parents are narcissistic and emotionally abusive. As a teenager I was also sexually abused by a teacher. After that is when I started suffering from moments of uncontrollable crying and intense emotions such as fear, sadness, and sometimes anger.

They last for 20 minutes to 2 hours, and I get them several times a week, sometimes several times a day.

The triggers can be: certain facial expressions, certain phrases or tones of voice, seeing or wearing clothes I was wearing while experiencing abuse or during extra difficult times in my life, seeing certain items, hearing certain sounds such as a parking car or a television or music that is turned off, lights that are turned off, etc.

I try to calm down when it happens but it is very difficult.

[Dee]

It sounds a lot like a flashback to me.  They come in so many different ways.  It is the triggers that make it sound like a flashback to me.  The other day I was trying to work on things to go inpatient and I had a panic attack about going.  That is much different from when I hear a phrase that my abuser used and I feel scared and small.  Sometimes flashbacks lead to panic as well.

[Gentian]

It sounds like a flashback to me too, but I'm not yet good at identifying them. I'm unfortunately pretty good at panic attacks though, and I bet the flashback could trigger a panic attack pretty easily. 

I have panic disorder and at my worst, had an average of  3 panic attacks a day in my twenties.  A panic attack for me starts with ringing ears, then within moments proceeds to tunnel vision that rapidly completely blacks out, sweaty palms, racing heart then WHAM I'm in full-blown panic that feels like I'm dying in a sudden overwhelm of physical sensations.  The onset is seconds and it resolves in minutes, less than 20 minutes probably, leaving me feeling weak and shaky.  They could happen any time for no apparent reason, but most often happened as I was waking up, especially if I fell asleep by mistake on the couch during the day. 

I'm just learning to identify EFs, but they seem to be more generalized and long lasting and awful-feeling than a panic attack.  I think they're worse.  Just a tip, I learned by chance that if I flipped tv channels as fast as they would go when I felt a PA start--so fast that  I couldn't even tell what was on them (but tried to see)--I could interrupt a panic attack, which was half the battle for me.  And once  I'd successfully stopped a couple of them, I stopped fearing them,mand they stopped coming for awhile, and have never returned in the same intense duration though they can still get me when I'm overtired or startled. I hope that helps.  I'm really sorry you're suffering.

[RBShard]

I too get both. Just this morning, on this forum, did I figure out that I was having emotional flashbacks, when I thought I was having inappropriate episodes of rage. The rage is out of proportion to whatever sets me off, but once it gains traction I have symptoms that are like a panic attack: depersonalization, hyperventilation, palpitations, lack of thermoregulation, feeling of going insane, etc. I think the difference is that the panic attack by itself passes quicker and isn't as intense. I've only started to have the raging emotional flashbacks since last July, but I had my first panic attack when I was 10. (I'm 48 now.) The rage has totally baffled me, because I haven't behaved that way since I was a child. I have described it as feeling like possessed by a demon or wanting to skin myself alive so I could get out of my body. Really scary.
Anyway, I hope you continue to read about C-PTSD, because this is certainly a situation where knowledge is power. One of the moderators shared this article with me: https://www.psychotherapy.net/article/complex-ptsd#section-emotional-neglect:-a-primary-cause-of-complex-ptsd?

[hurtbeat]

I am so sorry to hear about your family and the sexual abuse, Anxious!
This must've made you feel very unsafe, no wonder you are having panic attacks!

My younger sister was also sexually abused and some time later she also started suffering from panic attacks that would seemingly come out of nowhere, It seems like a normal response to that kind of hurt.
She would also be scared of things and not understand why exactly but I think that her subconscious was trying to process the abuse that way.
It's been years now and she is better and I trust you will be too after your body and mind has processed all of the emotions that you lock up inside when something like that happens.

/Sending love and safe feelings your way!

[Warrior94]

I think flash backs are panic attacks. I had one not too long ago and I was around friends having fun chatting before it happened. They brought up some stuff that triggered some emotions in me and I felt like I was beginning to fade away from the conversation. I felt after a while like I wasn't even in the same room, but in a different time. I was feeling what I had felt back several years ago. Sometimes certain sounds or smells trigger it too. It's weird, it's like you see your surroundings and it's all a blur because your mind says you are back in the time that the trigger sent you too. You begin to panic because you are between past and present reality. It's scary.