Where to turn?

[Calex Deeply]

  I'm looking for some idea of what a "normal"  or healthy action to take in my situation. I am in a geographical area where the abuse rates are double the rest of the state and the state is in the top area of percentages of other states. The culture is to me an abusive culture and they seem to have no idea what abuse actually entails. And that's just the medical professionals. I'm witnessing ethical mishandling of others'  and my own personal medical info and when/if I speak up my doctor becomes very threatening with mislabeling me and withholding medication and firing me as a patient. It has taken me 6 years to get any treatment so I am put in such a position that I put up and shut up or I suffer the damages of no treatment at all. I often find here that if you need any help at all the price is disempowerment.  I already have injury from lack of access to treatment options and my sense of integrity is greater than most. If I try to be reporting this anonymously it will still be too obviously me.  I hate that I'm in this position once again. It seems my life's work is to be put where I can see wrongdoing, due to my hyper vigilant mindfulness (superpower) of when things aren't right and harm is in the air.  I've tried all the normal actions in the past but the gaslighting of whistleblowers is their go to medical  decision. It's one thing to defend only myself but many others are being violated by the disregard of morals ethics and values. If i am to live I need the access to medical help.  So? Any thoughts? My conscience is hurting here!

[sanmagic7]

my heart aches for you, cd.   i was in a position of not getting medications in a timely manner, and i ended up writing a letter to the director of our clinic, the director of the clinic in charge of ours, and the person in charge of the pharmacy at the other clinic (from which our meds were sent).  it was about psych meds, so i did some research and included notations about the possibility of suicide if not receiving meds regularly, etc., and that they would be liable if anything happened to me. 

yes, others were being affected as well, but at the time i was focused on me.  we all benefitted, tho, because after that the monthly allotment of psych meds. came on a regular basis. 

i don't know if that's something you can do, or something similar.  the idea that you can't report this without dire consequences is appalling to me.  i hate that b.s.   i hope you can find a way to get what you need without more harm to you.    wishing you all the best with this. 

[Kizzie]

Hi Calex - So sorry to hear you are having such a difficult time, it makes me and that is a very normal and healthy reaction  .   You do need care but it should never be at the expense of your rights, dignity and health.

There is some information and links here that can help hopefully - http://outofthefog.net/C-PTSD/forum/index.php?topic=2518.0.   

This one looks it would provide some good advice/help:

"Is There Something Wrong or Questionable in Your Treatment?" by Dr. Estelle Disch. This article is one of many resources at a site called the Therapy Exploitation Link Line (TELL) for those who have been harmed in a therapeutic relationship (primarily in the United States and Australia).

[Boatsetsailrose]

Thank you for your help kizzie you are a true star 💫

[Candid]

the idea that you can't report this without dire consequences is appalling to me.  i hate that b.s.   

For me, it's too reminiscent of what went on in FOO. Suggest to someone outside FOO that M was abusing me? Cue narcissistic rage, and it will be devastating because no one knows better than M how to get to me. I'm SO glad I cut that off.

I hate these situations of vulnerability, especially when looking for therapeutic help.