Introducing myself

[sorrygirl]

Hi everybody,

1 year ago, my psychologist diagnosed me with C-PTSD. I refused to accept this. For me, my childhood was not that bad compare to others. But after 1 year of therapy, I just realised that she was right. I have a lot of symptoms:

Toxic shame
Hyper vigilance, feeling that I'm always in danger
Emotional flashback
Social and generalise anxiety
... and a lot more.

I just don't know how to take this all in. Relief that I'm not going crazy, anger against me and my parents, sadness, panic, critics,,...? Maybe all of them. I don't know.

I'm 46 and been living this way my whole life. I'm kind of tired of it. I just want to get better...

Sorry for any typo mistakes, I'm french 

[mourningdove]

It sounds like you have come to the right place. Welcome! 

[Georgie Girl]

Well all I can say is ditto,
I was diagnosed recently and can't believe I have reached my 50s before finding this out.
My main perpetrator was my mother who died last year and what I thought was the end actually became the beginning.

[Three Roses]

Welcome to you both!

[Kizzie]

Hi SorryGirl and a warm welcome to OOTS    There are a lot of us here who didn't realize we have Complex PTSD until later in life, partly because so many of us hide the symptoms, put on a mask and keep up appearances, until it becomes too hard to do any more. Another reason is that it was really well known until recently. 

And for those of us who seemingly didn't have it as bad as others we downplay the abuse, but in the end we all share the core trauma of not feeling loved, valued, or safe in this world. 

I hope being here is helpful for you