I made a huge step forward

[Dee]

I have been a big fight with my sister, huge.  She is mad I talked to a cousin that I have been forbidden from talking to.  She called me selfish, untrustworthy, said I betrayed her, she is disappointed in me.  I never went there; instead I maintained I can talk to who I want, when I want.  I don't have to ask for permission and I don't have to report it.  The less I responded the angrier she got and the worse she got.  She brought up my dad, how much she has gone through (implying when I reported him and he went to prison).  How she has worked hard to overcome my actions and I should have compassion for her.  Instead of begging for forgiveness, which I would have done a year ago, I maintained my position of having my rights.  I wanted to call her manipulative, controlling, and mean, but I didn't.  I simply kept it about my rights to talk to who I want.  She even asked if someone else was writing my texts.

My therapist asked today where I go from here.  I said nowhere.  I am not going back and I am maintaining my current position.  I mean that.  How she feels about me came out.  She said the past is behind us and it clearly it isn't and never will be.  I am heart broken.  Not to mention I feel betrayed by my brother in law; who I have known since 11 and thought of as a big brother.  I am heart broken, but proud of myself at the same time.  I stood up for myself, my rights, and never went to her level.

[Blueberry]

For your inner strength in sticking to your truth and your convictions, for your growth (not begging forgiveness), and integrity (your rights and not mentioning what you'd like to call S - mean etc.)   

For your sadness, for your broken heart, for the betrayal you feel - I'm sitting with you.      I know similar feelings versus FOO. 

[Rainagain]

Well done Dee.

Holding the line, maintaining your position and not getting drawn into escalation is a really powerful position to take.

A huge step forward.

[Rainydaze]

I'm sorry it had to come to this for you.  You did great though, you assertively stood up for what you believe in without resorting to picking holes in your sister, so you maintained absolute integrity. I think you're very right in saying that you can speak to whoever you please too, no-one has the authority to tell you who you should or shouldn't speak to!

[songbirdrosa]

Well done on maintaining yourself, Dee 

[Dee]

Thank you!   

[DecimalRocket]