Slowing it down

[milk]

Last week I met twice with a new T, number six. I think its a good fit.

Up until now, I was losing energy and perspective on my situation - negative thoughts were creeping in and my body was telling me to slow down, to sleep. I needed a good therapist.

T number six:

She is quick: asks good questions notices how I feel and makes accommodations in the space - she responds with meaning behind her action - she has thrown away the book and is taking me as I am. I am letting her do ‘her’ thing because I trust her; she has shown me a little bit of what she is capable of: mind body connection, CBT, holistic assessment (all approaches I respond well too)

The priority is to help me to develop coping strategies (thick skin) for living in a polarized city (nine months in a new city) caught in an imbalance of power that plays out through death, violence, hate, indifference, joy, content, mysticism, and pleasure. I live among civil strife. The nature of my work exposes me to these imbalances. I take care to manage a low risk factor. I am unable to leave the city till my finances clear. In the meantime I engage in work that supports my interests: noting the lifestyles people make and their stories.

The issue and how I deal:

I experience flashbacks daily that take emotional energy to work through - this takes energy away from my forward direction. I am balancing a few major changes in: finances, family, with a love, and in a career direction. Self care comes first and with that I choose my level of interaction of and between these life changes; this comes down to how I am with the people I come across everyday. Living in a ‘charged’ city requires a bit of calm, mindfulness, and care for myself and others. Throughout the day I make time for me — that comes through mindfulness body work whether its 20 minutes or three hours. I love it when I get three hours of body work in, it helps to manage the stress.

I confide in a family member and a close friend for support and its reciprocal. The work I am putting into my close relationships is starting to take shape.  I respect the people in my life and with that their schedules and needs.

Overall I am feeling better after a week of therapy, body work, and visiting OOTS.  I have read stories from a few new members and checked out the cPTSD thread for childhood trauma. I continue to struggle with freeze and flight response, in fact it is blocking me creatively at times, not with writing, but with drawing (main reason why I am with T#6)

Any thoughts on the matter are appreciated - thanks for listening.
If you don’t know how to respond, a group hug will do just fine.

[Jdog]

 

[Three Roses]

Do you know about Pete Walker? Here's a link to his website, info on EF management.

http://pete-walker.com/flashbackManagement.htm

There are steps to follow if you scroll down, in case you don't want to read all that. 

[woodsgnome]

Thanks for sharing some of your journey. It's great to know you have a T who's an individual and treats you the same way. Therapy is especially slippery sometimes and it helps to have one who demonstrates flexibility paired with expertise. I've had the good fortune to have found one like that and it makes a huge difference.

Sounds like you have some rather rough edges in navigating your present situation, but at least you have that grounding with the T and are getting as much self-care in as possible--sometimes it's a grind to even get that far. Maintaining a worthwhile perspective on things can be tricky, so congrats on what you're willing to do in working with the situation(s) seem in order. Hope you can stay with it and find a way to thrive despite the flashbacks and other setbacks.

                                                     

[milk]

Thank you for the  's - Jdog and others

Three Roses, I started reading his work a few years back — never finished it. Now is a good time to get back to it — EF management is what I need! Thanks for the lead!

Woodsgnome, yes! A good T does make a difference — I feel it already. I have come to realise that thriving happens in small instances, at least for now,  today I am getting to the beach before the sun goes down and its a new spot —- less people and quiet. I dont always stop in the midst of it to recognize the work done, thank you for the cheer!