Information about CPTSD and Interpersonal Relationships

[Kizzie]

The Capacity to Give Up on People - We're usually taught that being loyal to people through difficulty is always the right way. But in fact, at points, a good life requires us to do something that may feel highly strange, but also highly liberating: give up on one or two people, with whom we have already tried too hard for our own good.

C-PTSD and Interpersonal Relationships, Fabiana Franco, Oct 2018

What Appears to Be Mental Health Stigma Might Be Self-Care - Good article about why others may pull back/away from us (i.e., practicing self-care versus reacting to the stigma of mental health issues).

Careful Conflict, Sonia Connolly, added June 2019

Taking the War Out of Our Words, Sharon Ellison, 2009

[Rainagain]

I was going to post an item along the lines of 'Does anyone else have difficulty with....'

Then I read the link to the article on interpersonal relationships.

Thanks Kizzie, the article confirms the odd way I feel and behave toward others is down to trauma.

Made me smile to find the answer before posing the question.

[Kizzie]

Tks for pinging these articles Rainagain, I hadn't read them in a long time and they are a reminder that our interpersonal relationships need to be trauma-informed. It's not just us dealing with our CPTSD in isolation, if impacts those around us,  our partners, friends, children ....

Those in a relationship with a C-PTSD sufferer need to understand that they cannot always help behaving the way they do, and need love and support as they learn to control their behavior. The [person] with C-PTSD needs to appreciate that he or she is not always easy to be around and be open about their struggles.  

[Kizzie]

"I'm Glad They Died": The Benefits of Speaking Ill of the Dead: Why trauma survivors need to speak honestly about their deceased offenders." (Sept 2022)  https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/simplifying-complex-trauma/202209/i-m-glad-they-died-the-benefits-speaking-ill-the-dead

I came across this today and it seemed like something many of us need to hear to get past the guilt/shame of feeling relieved/glad when our abuser dies.  In the article the author mentions the book "I'm Glad My Mom Died" by Jennette McCurdy (2022).  It certainly resonated with people as it received 4.5 stars from 40,980 people.

Link - https://www.amazon.ca/Im-Glad-My-Mom-Died/dp/1982185821.

[Kizzie]

I like this article too - again, seems important for us (relational trauma survivors) to consider - "Embracing Bitterness: The Benefits of Resentment: Some resentment can protect us, help us heal, and boost self-worth." (Aug 2022)

Link - https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/simplifying-complex-trauma/202208/embracing-bitterness-the-benefits-resentment