This last week, the kids have a week off and so did my OH, their father, to decorate the kitchen.
As my daughter said at the beginning, whilst he was huffing and puffing because we had not finished eating breakfast and moved everything ready, 'this will not go well, and dad will be terrifying'. That is the first time she has mentioned his moods. She is right, I was dreading it. She hides in her bedroom. I had no idea, I thought I was the only one triggered by his moods, outbursts of anger, unpredictable, just like my mother.
There have been some other conversations between my daughter and myself about this. Apparently my son hates it too but isn't so scared, he is taller than his dad now.
What do I do? I know how hard it is when you realise people are frightened of you, - I have been frightening in the past. My most common response is to freeze, then fawn. It is only recently I have managed to show any feeling when his outbursts happen, and it has improved. I don't feel he is blaming me now for whatever is upsetting him.
My OH is not violent, he just explodes, then it is over.
G
