Politics induced stress

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AncientSoul

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Politics induced stress
« on: January 17, 2019, 08:26:59 PM »
I don't know who to talk to, so I came back here.

Last week I lost a long time friend. It was a total surprise and I'm still shocked. I considered that friend like a brother, and he has been very helpful over the years. And I never felt like I could not speak my mind, but I tempered myself and my tongue anyway. Still, I am in favor of fairness in life and I do voice my opinion.

When I left my friends house, everything seemed fine. We had eaten, I thanked him as usual and I always mean those words. I had a lot on my mind and have had. At the beginning of this week, I got an email from my friend. He told me off, told me to F*** Off, and then said that I am terrible as I wouldn't back him several years ago in regard to his wife's family business and a Union beginning for that businesses workers. (I am and always will be Pro Union.)


He explained that the business was about to go under, and it sounded like he was blaming me. His family was said to use a lot of undocumented workers, and he himself in years past has bragged about using undocumented workers himself. He also bragged how they lived a few families to a small room, and worked twenty hour days because they wanted to do that to make more money. They got paid by the weight of the goods they produced.


My friend said that he is never going to vote for a Democrat again, and that I should "Let Trump do his job." Then he told me to F*** Off again.

I thought that his email had been hacked. So I responded to warn him. I found out it really was him, and he tore me a new one again in an email, saying things that I knew only he and I knew.

I have lost so many friends because they are for Trump and I am not. I've been threatened, blocked, unfriended. You get the picture. Thing is, the stuff I've been warning about for about three years is all playing out live right now.

My friend will not respond to me anymore. I have something of his and wish to return it. I may have another friend I know who also knows him do that for me. I fear a physical confrontation, and knowing me, that would not be good for him. Sad thing to think about.

Trump is dividing us all. My heart actually has been hurting because of all this. And the stress is not needed. But I will not back down in my beliefs.

Best,
AncientSoul

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BeHea1thy

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Re: Politics induced stress
« Reply #1 on: January 18, 2019, 05:14:41 PM »
Greetings Ancient Soul,

Quote
Trump is dividing us all. My heart actually has been hurting because of all this. And the stress is not needed. But I will not back down in my beliefs.

Politics is a hot topic and I suspect probably not within the guidelines of this forum. But I'm not here to correct, if that's true, someone will object and one of the admins will send you a very nice message. I think the feeling I'd like to address instead, is loss.

First, I am so sorry that a long standing friendship has dissolved and left you high and dry. It's difficult to fathom why people who formerly enjoyed each other would be so strident, but it's an unfortunate reality which seems to have a lot of cultural support these days. Often I check a news app, and it is discouraging that the majority or top news items are focused on specific people and then myriad ways of interpreting actions. Over time, it's like the drip, drip, drip of water on rock, slowly eroding sensibilities, interest, motivation etc.

But here's the thing. The "friends" that have threatened, blocked and cut off contact are teaching you something. Is it time to look at your investments in relationships and who you considered stable, authentic, responsible? Do these people reflect your own idea of integrity and support an evolving, intelligent, caring society?

There have been certain times in my life when "friends" did things like this to me, basically I'll lump it in the "Betrayal Basket." I asked myself WHY? In short, over time, I came to understand, it's their problem, not mine. And yes, as I lived a life with less friends, different friends, gradually, something different came to light. I had less drama, less anguish and the anguish I did have was focused on lack of authenticity of people around me, vs how I would answer or resolve some current injustice which wounded me.

I am trusting that what I say here is received the way it is sent, with kindness, concern and the best intentions. I'm glad you brought it here because I think it is a topic which a great many of us struggle with. (someday I'll learn to write without ending sentences with prepositions)

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AncientSoul

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Re: Politics induced stress
« Reply #2 on: January 18, 2019, 07:53:10 PM »
BeHea1thy, thank you for the thoughts.

If my post is inappropriate, I will take it down. Truth is, in real life I am nearly always alone, and this was an outlet in dealing with my CPTSD. 

Also this morning, I read an article in the AARP monthly newsletter which gave credibility to actually dying of a broken heart. My loosing a long time friend for whom I was in their wedding party years ago, to me, its a great loss. And my political views and Liberal stance were told to me to be the cause.  Thing is, I do not recall discussing politics or saying anything about politics to my friend when we spoke last week. I have literally backed off with all my friends over the last year. They know my position, and the facts are coming forth almost daily of which I warned.

I needed to say something to someone, and I thank you for giving me comfort with your words.

AncientSoul