In EF and struggling

[Boatsetsailrose]

Hi I'm struggling with ef and what comes with it these days ...obsessional round and round thoughts of si. I have absolutely no intent its just a horrible thought that loops round and round and is causing me great distress .
I just want it to stop i don't even know why it happens . i wish i had an explanation for it .. I feel anxious and lonely ....
I spoke with the nurse today and that helped ..then went and did some meditation and grounding.. I've had extra sleep ...
I think by wanting it to go it's making it worse.    .I'm trying just allowing it to be there ..telling it to think its self (a bit like think of a white elephant ) ..
Any help appreciated ...
Ive been in the house a lot today doesn't seem to have helped

[Rainagain]

Sorry to hear this boats.

I could try and say something helpful but I'm the same and I don't know how to stop the thoughts either.

One thing I noticed this week, as soon as the thought 'I'm not doing xyz very much lately' occurs to me then it starts again immediately.

[Kizzie]

Sorry to hear this Boats, do you know what's driving the EF? Maybe talking about that will help reduce the thoughts.  Here to listen and sending some friendly care your way 

[Boatsetsailrose]

Hi rain
Sorry to hear you going through it too..sending you warm wishes
Hi Kizzie
It triggered when the local council won't take responsibility for a benefit payment due to me being in shared housing and i can't get my name on the account. In itself it's not a big problem as i have money and believe it will get sorted eventually and i have support around it. It seems more that it tapped into some unworthy /don't fit in/don't belong anywhere stuff and i feel.out of control. Its  more difficult lately as i just seem to be flashing in and out for lengthy periods of time and it seems to be merging. Im asking myself is having obsessional SI thoughts common with cptsd ? The past year it has got worse over time ..i have ab no intent its just a horrible anxiety /self hatred thing i think ? My mood states are quite dramatic and i disassociate to the point of i don't feel i know.who i am ..
Then when i come back.out i feel happy and bright and secure like it never happened . im keeping a diary for the nurse to see and waiting for psych review and psychology referral . im debating at the moment if to up my anti dep ? My anxiety is high and im doing regular grounding and regulation exercises which is helping ...
All suggestions /experience greatly received