eating disorder

[tired]

missbliss:  I might think more about the oxytocin.  Funny how simple things make a big difference but we don't think about it.  Being single and isolated maybe I don't get some normal nurturing that is a necessary part of day to day life.  I just had a fitness client and when she left she gave me a hug and I realized I don't get hugs very often. Just an odd thing.  I guess I have a cat that is very relaxing to hold.

For a long time I was allowing myself to emotionally eat but only healthy food then I changed my rule.  I had this idea that I wanted someone to cook for me so I would drive through and get whatever one gets at a drive through. Not that the lady handing me a burger out of a window actually prepared it special for me.  But for a split second it felt like that.

This week I'm trying to get back into healthy food binge or not.  I made hummus, which is a lot of carbs and fat and feels very comforting without being junk food. 

I haven't eaten much all week, mostly juice, but tomorrow is my "big eating day" and I think I'll watch the videos when I'm eating.