unhealthy FOO behaviour

Started by Blueberry, March 16, 2019, 01:13:26 AM

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Blueberry

I'm talking unhealthy behaviour when I was growing up, but actually it continues.

People say that when you want to discuss an issue with someone, you should not bring up past behaviour, you should stay in the present. That's what FOO says. The problem is they wouldn't allow you to discuss it at the time either. That didn't just happen to me. enF refused to allow uPDM to discuss issues. He just wouldn't listen so she'd blurt them out whenever, like when he had friends over. But what did he expect? He didn't want to hear it later. He didn't want to hear it ever of course. I suffered more directly under her than him, but he's by no means innocent.

My brothers both discuss issues with their wives and present day issues with enF and uPDM now, or more likely they tell enF and uPDM in no uncertain terms where to get off, but allowing me to discuss anything would count as rocking the boat too much. So they block me.

I wouldn't go as far as to say I feel sorry for uPDM because of the treatment she got at the hands of enF and possibly still gets but I have a bit more understanding for her in general, but not for her treatment of me if that makes sense.

This has all come clear to me since my second yoga stay.