Introduction

Started by Cats, May 15, 2019, 05:09:45 AM

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Cats

I self diagnosed and I'm pretty sure.  Still confused about a lot, but the symptoms listed are a perfect fit.  Wasted my whole life trying to treat depression unsuccessfully.  Just learned to cope daily and survive instead of live.  Allowed people to under value me.  Wasted my life or it certainly feels like it as I've accomplished nothing except hold on.  Totally frustrated and ready to throw in the towel.  Can I treat myself with books?  As finding a person capable of treating cptsd is probably like winning the lottery.  To say that I'm extremely frustrated is a gross understatement.  And really?  Those verification letters below are like Chinese.  This will take me several tries. 

Cats

And just an FYI.  The only thing that has kept me alive was my belief in God, and those of you who either have had bad experiences such that you are going to talk about how you hate "fundamentalism" or whatever you want to call it, it's ok by me if you keep it YOUR experience, but if you hate that I believe it or want to make fun of what I believe, this will not work for me.

SharpAndBlunt

Hello Cats, welcome to the forum. I hope you won't find any negative judgement regarding your beliefs, but I can say I definitely have never seen anything like that happening here. It has been a positive and respectful environment.

There are lots of resources on here. Personally I feel like I have only scratched the surface, I too am learning and self educating.

Best wishes

SaB

Patticake

Hi Cats,  :)
You are welcome here & will be heard & respected. I so get what you're saying & totally get how you're feeling. Misdiagnosis is fairly common with Cptsd, unfortunately. I believe more & more therapists are becoming aware of Cptsd & trauma treatment is now becoming part of their education.

Because I am older, there wasn't any understanding of Cptsd back in the day when my symptoms first began. I, like you, spent many years chasing treatment for depression. Only in the past few years did I find a T that diagnosed me correctly with Cptsd.

I still feel,at times, that my life was wasted because of the enormous struggles of managing the symptoms of Cptsd while trying to work, raise children, show up in life everyday functional.

My faith in God was crucial in my life. I, too, probably wouldn't have survived without God's help. He, literally, carried me, and continues to carry me, through dark days.

I received much help through books. Pete Walker, Bessel van der Kolk, Alice Miller are just a few authors whose books have been great resources. I read them over & over again.
Your story is more common than you probably realize. Please know, you are NOT alone. I am terribly sorry for what you have been through. I get it. No throwing in the towel...read books, do your research & you will find answers & help.

We are all here for you on this forum. There are many loving & caring people here to listen, understand & be helpful.
You will be in my prayers as your recovery journey continues. 🙏🏻

Three Roses

I'm 62 and it's only been since coming here a few years ago that I've found any sort of understanding and help. We're a supportive community with a mix of beliefs, and you're not alone in believing in God (I do, too). I've also wasted time treating depression, for about 30 years or so, a bit like treating the pain of a broken arm without ever addressing the broken bone.

Books have probably been THE most helpful source, for me. Lots of us have a copy of From Surviving To Thriving on our nightstands. And, The Body Keeps The Score has been a huge resource and help to me, also on my nightstand.

I'm glad you're here and I hope to hear more from you. Regardless of your beliefs, you are worth caring about, and I do.  :hug:

Cats

Thanks Three Roses and Patticake and Sharp and Blunt for your encouragement.  I look forward to reading some books.

Not Alone

Cats,
I understand the feeling of just coping. I've had times where just taking the next breath felt like a big effort. There are people who understand and care. My relationship to God is very important to me too, so you are not alone in that. Welcome to this forum.

Ecowarrior888

Welcome <3
Don't worry I believe in God too and I truly believe He is what saved my mom, my sister and I from my dad. I don't know where I would be without Him. So no worries, your beliefs are respected and it is very welcoming here from my experience so far. It helps just knowing you are not alone. And even like today I am experiencing insomnia and just welcoming others joining us here helps. So, feel free to post and message, you will feel lots of support here. I was scared to post at first but now if anything, it has felt so comforting. I hope it does for you too :)