Information I didnt want to know given to me/things piling up & struggling badly

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WideSargassoSea

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Hi Kizzie .  That group has strict limits and are very finite meaning they were not accessible at the moment in a specific and important way.  I got this information from the people involved themselves. I cant go into those limits of their resources because it would identify which town I live in, so I have to be vague about it.  But all I can say is-not all these places listed are as advertised right now due to finite resources which has severely limited it in a specific way.

Separate from that group link; it is not true to say that 'most resources are open to men and women'. So many groups and funding are now strictly limited to groups that do not include common men and are ONLY for women-specifically excluding men. I do not wish to debate here, as its not why I originally posted, and I appreciate the links previously added to offer help-but I do want facts here to be accurate and it is a raw spot for many men, including myself, to be told there is available help of an equal nature available to us when it simply is not so.  Im sure no offense was meant, but I do find it slightly insulting. I wanted to redress this fact in light of this, as I do not wish to see other vulnerable men being upset by inaccurate claims about equal help.

I wont mention this here any further (the plain facts speak for themselves over this issue anyway-and are undeniable), as I do not think this the right place for debate. I trust you will respect this, so would appreciate no more on that matter, and trust more care will be taken in future in light of the facts I mentioned.
 
« Last Edit: June 11, 2019, 06:13:43 PM by WideSargassoSea »

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Kizzie

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If you did not wish to debate it perhaps you should not have brought it up, but you did and so I am offering a different opinion based on my own experience of researching and gathering resources for over five years here at OOTS. Happy to agree to disagree though. 

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Three Roses

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I think men are greatly underserved in this regard. I've heard it here time and time again, as well as hearing it from more than one male friend. Part of it is societal pressure to be stronger, tougher, etc. Hang in there, I know you're having a rough time of it, WSS.  :hug:

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Kizzie

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Just for everyone's info WSS has been banned b/c he was banned previously under a different name but came back using a new account and name, something we do not allow here at OOTS for obvious reasons. 

Please know that banning is not something I take lightly but if I or Blueberry suspect someone is not here for the right reasons (e.g., trolling by making provocative statements) we flag them, watch them and discuss the member's posts together over time.  In this case when the issue about a lack of services for men vs women came up it pinged me b/c it is the same issue as in a previous situation. I checked his IP address and confirmed he was banned previously for trolling.  The back and forth via PMing behind the scene when he was banned previously were less than respectful and that is where I draw the line.

Unfortunately there are actually troll packs out there who gain status by seeing if they can disrupt forums, but I've avoided talking about this b/c I didn't want legitimate members to be afraid to post and/or make friendships here.  Given this latest incident and the tendency on trolls to be repeat offenders (we actually had one troll come back 6+ times), it's time. 

There are flags and BB and I watch for them so please know we do as much as possible to keep this forum free of trolls and safe for you and us.  What I will say to each of you though is if your gut tells you someone might not be legit, listen to it and let me or BB  know.  We never reveal who has reported something to us, it's completely confidential. 

Kizzie
« Last Edit: June 12, 2019, 01:26:53 AM by Kizzie »

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Three Roses

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Thanks for keeping this a safe place!  :hug:

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sanmagic7

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i echo 3r, kizzie.  i know you've helped me w/ some of this in the past, and it's truly appreciated. 

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Kizzie

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 :grouphug: 

I just want to give a BIG shout out here to Blueberry who puts her all into moderating and keeping OOTS respectful and safe.  Tks BB!   :applause:
« Last Edit: June 12, 2019, 07:58:05 PM by Kizzie »

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Blueberry

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Thank you so much Kizzie!

It's great to work together with you keeping this forum as safe and respectful as we can. I've learned so much from you moderating and am always so glad that when I'm unsure, I can leave decisions up to you. You know what to do, how to react, and I don't need to stress about it or get triggered.

 :hug:  :hug:  :)

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Kizzie

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It may surprise you but I learn as much from you (and everyone here for that matter, you all are a great tribe to belong to  ;D