Both have CPTSD?

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TunnelEyes

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Both have CPTSD?
« on: June 02, 2019, 11:20:39 PM »
Hiya, new here.

Anyway most of this is speculation but just theorizing and overthinking as usual.

So I'm concerned about finding myself slightly attracted to someone with the same issues/illness. This is a double edged sword in that although we u derstand each other very well, this could potentially be a very bad combination?

If anyone has any personal experience I'd love to hear, Google searches yield very little

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Three Roses

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Re: Both have CPTSD?
« Reply #1 on: June 03, 2019, 12:28:09 AM »
Hi there, welcome! There's a ton of resources here, and a supportive community to help you. I hear your question about relationships - my husband and I have many of the same issues, although they may manifest differently. It made for a volatile relationship when we were younger, that's for sure. We are now in our 60s and coming up on our 37th anniversary this summer. I think it's impossible to find someone without issues; if you're both searching for healing, together and separately, it can work imo. As long as you're both safe, and learning from mistakes. Just my two cents.
 :heythere:

(PS - you may not get a lot of welcomes where you've posted - if you want, you can try an intro post here. https://cptsd.org/forum/index.php?board=10.0   You don't have to, but it may feel nice to get more "welcome" comments.)
« Last Edit: June 03, 2019, 12:32:55 AM by Three Roses »

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Blueberry

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Re: Both have CPTSD?
« Reply #2 on: June 03, 2019, 08:53:55 AM »
Welcome to the forum TunnelEyes!

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jedi_giraffe

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Re: Both have CPTSD?
« Reply #3 on: September 08, 2019, 07:34:45 PM »
I think my boyfriend and I both have C-PTSD. We're in couples' therapy because our traumas caused so much damage to our relationship for several years. In a way, we have an understanding of each other that other people may not have, which can be helpful. However, there is a lot of uncertainty about if we'll be able to continue our relationship because of all the damage that's been done. I think 2 people with C-PTSD can have a successful relationship if they are willing and able to communicate openly about their triggers and work hard to support each other. I really hope that'll be the case for us.

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Anjulie

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Re: Both have CPTSD?
« Reply #4 on: September 10, 2019, 10:36:05 AM »
Hi TunnelEyes, and welcome to the forum.
Quote
if you're both searching for healing, together and separately, it can work imo. As long as you're both safe, and learning from mistakes.
I agree with Three Roses on that.
My husband and I have both cptsd although with him it's a milder form. We are very happy together even though we separately have big problems to deal with. Certainly, sometimes its hard to not get "infected" when the other has a very hard time. But overall, we just "fit" perfectly as a couple ( I had loads of short relationships with "healthier"  boyfriends before and it never worked).
I know that this may be rare luck. But you can just find out by trying, in my opinion.