therapist talking to me like a child

[Bix]

I am trying to go back to therapy after some damaging experiences in the past.  I feel pretty burned by disastrous emdr, and trust issues with therapists.

I had an initial session, and right away remembered one of my big problems was that therapists start to use this type of voice, which sounds like they are talking to me like a child. I hate it. It drops me into this kind of dead zone where I can't think or talk, and I feel panic like something really bad is about to happen to me..... it feels very bad.

Does anyone know why therapists do this? Is it a style thing, or some therapy room technique? Is it possible to bring it up and request it is not used? Is this part of therapy? I hope I'm making sense.

[Kizzie]

Any T that takes this approach is not seeing their clients as self-determining adults and that is very problematic (as your reaction is trying to tell you). You could talk to the T or you could find another who doesn't take this approach.   

[Bix]

Thanks Kizzie. I will see how this second session goes and bring it up if it happens again.

[sanmagic7]

hey, bix,

i am a therapist, and have to admit i have never talked to a client as if they were a child.  i don't know the point of this w/ your new t, but i agree w/ kizzie - if it happens again, you have every right to question this method of communication.  always remember, the t is there for you, and not the other way around.  they are to be a guide - you know yourself best.  they have tools and techniques at their disposal that can help you navigate stormy waters or rough pathways to get to your goals, but you always have the power for your own recovery.

i usually give a new t 4-6 sessions as a tryout period, altho there are certainly times when you know sooner than that that something is off or isn't working.  trust your gut.  you have the right to ask questions about anything, put a stop to processing if it's going too fast for you, or even state that you need clarification on something.  this is your life - you deserve the best, most caring help available.

best to you with this.  any other questions, feel free to pm me if you like.  i hope this gets straightened out for you, and you end up having a valuable, healing experience.  sending love and a hug full of all the best.

[Kizzie]

I hope it goes better Bix.  If you do decide you want to change T's we do have some helpful info here - https://cptsd.org/forum/index.php?board=106.0 and here https://www.outofthestorm.website/treatment.