Hi everyone

[Jazzy]

Hi Holidayay, welcome. Sorry I'm a bit late, I haven't been here in a while myself.

You say that you don't have all the answers any more, but you know what? That's okay. None of us do, and none of us are expecting you to have them all either. Something I still struggle with is that I was never good enough for my parents, I'm still not good enough for them by a long shot. Growing up, I internalized this, and I was never good enough for myself either... but now I try to direct my energy towards accepting myself, and not setting standards that are unrealistic, and beyond perfect. Really, it's okay to not be perfect!

In your original post, you mentioned you have been having some bad dreams, sometimes you don't know if you're awake or not. I just want to let you know that you aren't alone. For most of my life I had horrible night terrors (with bouts of sleep paralysis as well). It's not rational, there's no words I can use to explain how bad they were. I think I hated the part of not knowing if I was awake or not the most. If you know you're in a nightmare, at least that gives you a foundation to start from. I have ruined countless shirts, and more than one mattress from sweat stains and thrashing about. Enough about me, but I just wanted you to know you're not alone. Just do your best with them, again, it is okay to be where you are.... and one day along your journey of healing you will find they are not as frequent as they used to be.

Take care of yourself, and try to enjoy the new city/hospital.