Snowdrop's journal

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Tee

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #105 on: September 04, 2019, 12:33:20 AM »
wow!  that's amazing work, snowdrop.  when those memories can lose their impact, that's a huge shift in your brain.  plus, all the energy work you did is a big deal, too.  i hope you can take some time for rest, let your brain and body process all this, integrate and jell fully.  what you're doing, how you keep pushing yourself can be great, but it can also be exhausting.  i know that part all too well.

and, forward!  love and hugs   :hug:
:yeahthat:
Big hug and lots of love and support :hug:

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Snowdrop

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #106 on: September 04, 2019, 08:21:41 AM »
Agreed, it definitely takes time for things to settle.   :)
« Last Edit: September 04, 2019, 02:11:11 PM by Snowdrop »

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Snowdrop

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #107 on: September 06, 2019, 12:46:08 PM »
I've had a good few days. More releasing, more dissolving, and more integration. I'm feeling pretty good, and I haven't felt triggered by things that would normally trigger me. I haven't gone numb, I've been feeling appropriate emotions, and I've been feeling calmly in control.

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Three Roses

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #108 on: September 06, 2019, 01:04:13 PM »
Awesome!  :cheer:

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sanmagic7

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #109 on: September 06, 2019, 02:06:30 PM »
that is so great, snowdrop!  well done   :thumbup:

sending love and a hug filled with continuing integration   :hug:

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Tee

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #110 on: September 06, 2019, 09:32:28 PM »
that is so great, snowdrop!  well done   :thumbup:

sending love and a hug filled with continuing integration   :hug:
:yeahthat:
Glad things are looking up. :hug:

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Jazzy

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #111 on: September 06, 2019, 10:27:54 PM »
That's great, good for you! :)

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Snowdrop

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #112 on: September 08, 2019, 06:11:08 AM »
Thanks everybody  :grouphug:

More good news. Went to an outdoor event in a town yesterday where there were crowds, and I enjoyed it. No apprehension beforehand, no looking for escape routes, no hyper-vigilence, no dissociation, and no going numb. There were also a couple of other things that would normally have triggered me, but they didn't.

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Blueberry

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #113 on: September 08, 2019, 11:37:01 AM »
 :)  :thumbup:  :applause:  :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:

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Tee

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #114 on: September 08, 2019, 02:39:04 PM »
 :cheer: :applause: that's awesome snowdrop. :hug:

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sanmagic7

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #115 on: September 08, 2019, 05:18:39 PM »
wow!  look at you go!!!    :applause:  so amazing, the work you're doing, and the results show it.  well done!   :thumbup:  love and hugs, sweetie.   :hug:

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Snowdrop

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #116 on: September 09, 2019, 06:53:47 PM »
Thanks Blueberry, Tee and San. I do appreciate your support.  :grouphug:

I had a conversation today which would previously have been triggering, crashed through my boundaries, and made me leap into caretaking mode. My boundaries are intact, I'm keeping my distance, and I don't think I'm triggered.

There's an echo of past trauma resonating in me from the conversation, but it doesn't feel problematic as such. It's just slightly amplified, making it more noticeable. I'm viewing this as a signpost for what I should work on next. I will do some dissolving this evening to see if any of it will shift using that method.

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sanmagic7

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #117 on: September 09, 2019, 09:12:34 PM »
you are doing so much and so well.  i'm very happy for you in that you are dissolving so much that has been problematic for you before, and holding boundaries - quite an accomplishment!  love and hugs, sweetie.   :hug:

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notalone

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #118 on: September 09, 2019, 10:23:13 PM »
 :cheer: :cheer: :applause:

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woodsgnome

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Re: Snowdrop's journal
« Reply #119 on: September 09, 2019, 10:56:17 PM »
Snowdrop wrote:

"There's an echo of past trauma resonating..." I experience echoes a lot ... and it's important to note -- they're echoes, and dissolving them, as you indicate, at least diminishes their immediate impact.

Your approach to dealing with this is inspiring. Keep it up!

      :grouphug: