Trigger warning - incident

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Snowdrop

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Trigger warning - incident
« on: August 14, 2019, 06:37:51 PM »
I'm posting this here because I don't want to put it in my journal, and I feel I have to put it somewhere. I'm sorry if it upsets anyone. I may delete it later.

=== TW ===





Up until a couple of hours ago I was having a good day. But then the doorbell rang. My H went to the door, and it was a man trying to sell things. When H said he wasn't interested and tried to close the door, the man started shouting and put his foot in the door. H managed to get the door shut, and the man started screaming threats through it, saying he was going to come back later and put our windows out. He was still shouting as he walked round the corner.

H reported it to the police, and then I spoke to our neighbour. The man was aggressive to her too, so she has also contacted the police.

H was a bit shaken up by it, as you don't expect this kind of thing to happen. He now seems OK.

My flashbacks started a few minutes after I spoke to our neighbour. Very shaky, crying, and more violent memories about my half-brother surfaced. Scared to close my eyes, so staring at the window. Alternating between feeling scared, and too scared to feel scared. Currently numb. I don't want to feel scared and shaky, but I don't want to push the emotions down.

Logically, I know it wasn't personal as he was also aggressive to our neighbour. He was just an aggressive man who really needs to work on his sales technique. But emotionally...  :spooked:

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notalone

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Re: Trigger warning - incident
« Reply #1 on: August 14, 2019, 06:45:39 PM »
Snowdrop,
I am so sorry that happened. That sounds really scary. No wonder you were triggered. You are not doing anything wrong by being in a triggered state. That can happen anytime, and that incident was really scary. When I'm in a triggered state, my therapist says that my only job is to do what I can to bring calm to my triggered body. Maybe a blanket and some nice music will help a little. A hot drink coffee or tea helps me a little bit sometimes.  I wish I could just sit with you.  :hug: Is your husband still home? Seems like it would be good to not be alone.

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Snowdrop

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Re: Trigger warning - incident
« Reply #2 on: August 14, 2019, 06:51:29 PM »
Yes, H is with me. Thank you. I will go and make a chamomile tea.  :hug:

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Blueberry

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Re: Trigger warning - incident
« Reply #3 on: August 14, 2019, 07:13:39 PM »
A gentle  :hug: if that helps.

One scary incident. I think it would freak out people without (c)ptsd too, so no wonder you were triggered. I hope you can find some calm for your triggered state. I often need several different things: tea, talking to Inn.Children, wrap up in blanket...

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Snowdrop

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Re: Trigger warning - incident
« Reply #4 on: August 14, 2019, 07:36:05 PM »
Thank you, Blueberry, the  :hug: is welcome. Currently sipping tea and cuddling a toy cat. Feeling scared about going to sleep tonight.

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Blueberry

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Re: Trigger warning - incident
« Reply #5 on: August 14, 2019, 07:39:23 PM »
 :hug: :hug: :grouphug:

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Tee

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Re: Trigger warning - incident
« Reply #6 on: August 14, 2019, 08:08:28 PM »
Snowdrop that is terrifying.  I'm glad your H is there to help keep you safe.  A few years ago our house was busted into while my kids and I were out of town and my H was at work during the day.  They came busted the back door in half and Randsacked the house.  It took months to feel safe in my home again. So I feel for you.  :hug:

 Hopefully the police will be on the watch for him in the area and should he come back around they will pick him up.  I hope he won't though.  :no: :grouphug: gentle hug if understanding. :hug:

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Jazzy

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Re: Trigger warning - incident
« Reply #7 on: August 14, 2019, 11:08:03 PM »
Wow, I'm so sorry this happened to you. It sounds like it would be absolutely terrifying, surely anyone would be upset. Its great you have your H with you, though, and now the man is gone so you can focus on yourself.  It might take some time to get through it, but feel free to pamper yourself in the meantime, whatever you need to do. Feeling worried about sleeping tonight is only natural, but keep in mind that the police never sleep, and with multiple reports they're sure to take it seriously. I hope you feel better soon, let us know if there's anything we can do to help. Take care! :)

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Snowdrop

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Re: Trigger warning - incident
« Reply #8 on: August 15, 2019, 09:15:21 AM »
Thank you so much for all your replies and for caring about me. Knowing you were all there made a big difference, and helped me through it.  :grouphug:

I woke up at about 3:30 this morning in a bit of a panic as I thought I'd heard the doorbell. I think it was just hypervigilance though. I've now calmed down, and done what I can to gain some positives from what happened. I'll say more in my journal, as that feels like a more appropriate place.

Thanks again, and love and hugs to you all. You're amazing. :grouphug: