So Very Unmotivated

[Jdog]

R-

I love the idea of using body tension as a hook to get back to the moment- I hadn't put this awareness into a positive frame before and now that you have helped me see it this way- it fits!

I just recently discovered a very subtle thing that I do with my neck and shoulders and my core that constrict my breathing and make optimal running posture difficult.  I think this same set of bodily constrictions may be responsible for my earlier violin injury.  Just today I purposely released this construction and felt like I was flying instead of running (though adrenaline and such may have also played a role ).  Anyways, I thank you for the insite.

[Rrecovery]

Hi Jdog, So glad the reframe was helpful.  Yay! 

[schrödinger's cat]

Glad to hear you're feeling better, Rrecovery.    Your way of using tension as meditation-fodder sounds really really interesting. I'll have to try it out. Thanks for sharing this.

[lonewolf]

Hi Lonewolf    I'm glad this thread has been helpful.

I have practiced mindfulness and meditation for many years now.  There are many ways to do both (though it's most often done using the breath as the anchor).  Since the adrenaline addiction awareness I have been using "tension in the body" as my anchor.  When I become aware of it I relax it.  My energy is up, motivation up, sleep improved, depression - none! 

I can't wrap my head around mindfulness or mediation, yet, but maybe you can help me. I sincerely find so much of what I am discovering here so overwhelming since it means I have to do so much work to become a better person compared to my friends who had a much more normal childhood. It is helpful to have all of this information (which I am grateful for) but then I am not sure what to do with "it" all on top of everything else that is "wrong" with me (sorry for the cynicism, but I do find all of this so overwhelming at times).

[Rrecovery]

Hi SC thank you! 

Lonewolf, I understand.  It is a long road, and there is so much to learn and heal from. I can only imagine how difficult it must be to read all of this info "at once" and how overwhelming it must be.   One thing that has helped me was to realize that this process is not about becoming a better person, it's about finding our way back to who we really are.  I think there are a lot of people in the world who don't ever really connect with their authentic selves and live from that place.  For us, there is more pressure (our suffering) to do this work.  The work is done one day at a time, and we heal a little more every day.  Slowly but surely you will feel better and better and better and better...