Sleep Disorder for Life?

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MarieKT

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Sleep Disorder for Life?
« on: October 09, 2019, 12:37:43 PM »
            I recently had an appointment with my now, only doctor, my psychiatrist. I was relaying to him my problems with sleeping. Basically, that I get anxiety at night and wake very easily and canít go back to sleep. He started to probe me slightly as to whether anything traumatic had happened to me. I did mention, I thought it relevant, that my father did not let us sleep very often. Nights were always chaos and filled with being awoken many times by my dad. It wasnít every night, and some were certainly worse than others, but I would say at least half the time, if not more. I stressed that it wasnít a matter of waking you up once, it was often many times a night. I didnít go into much detail with him, and he likewise didnít ask. He seemed to think it had a lot to do with my current sleep issue. He repeated several times how traumatic that is to have gone through; I vaguely agreed and then changed the subject.
             I have a difficult time with the label of being a traumatized person. It seems to denote someone who needs help, or is in some way damaged. I admit that I could fit that criteria, and yet I am repulsed by it. I prefer people not to look at me too closely, I prefer to stay in the background. I am very uncomfortable with people being sympathetic towards me, and I suppose that  is why I feel so strange admitting these things to him. I typically like to speak to my psychiatrist  about ideas and concepts, and he seems to like that as well. Iíve actually been his patient for something like twelve or thirteen years! As a psychiatrist, I kind of felt that I just needed to relay certain symptoms with him, rather than the cause of those symptoms.
            I felt there was nothing he could actually do for me in the end. I spoke with him, and he canít write me scripts forever for sleep medications that are ultimately addictive (I have a history of being addicted). My problems with sleep are more lifelong. He knows I use cannabis and suggested looking there for a sleep aid. He couldnít really offer any solutions for me. I am ultimately left to deal with it myself, and it does increasingly feel like a lifelong problem for me, which might never be solved. Iím starting to believe my brain was damaged by the constant startle response from being awoken and scared so often. Iím not sure what Iím supposed to do with myself for the rest of my life, we all need sleep...I guess itís just never going to be easy for me.

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Kizzie

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Re: Sleep Disorder for Life?
« Reply #1 on: October 09, 2019, 04:30:38 PM »
Sorry to hear you are having difficulties with sleep too MarieKT, I would give my right arm if I could just sleep better. I am hoping to explore the use of cannabis for my sleep issues too .  We're moving soon and in our new location there is a clinic which has trauma and cannabis informed medical doctors.  :boogie: Cannabis is legal here (Canada) so we're starting to see more information and services like this.

Anyway,  if/when I do find out anything I'll be sure and post about it and/or you can always PM me. (I suspect by the time we get settled in it won't be until Nov that I can get to the clinic.) 
 

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MarieKT

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Re: Sleep Disorder for Life?
« Reply #2 on: October 09, 2019, 05:24:02 PM »
Thanks for the response. I live in PA and have a medical card here. Cannabis has really helped me over the years but it has its limits, for me. Most people find that Indica cannabis strains make them sleepy and put them to bed. When I was younger I remember this effect. Unfortunately, it no longer works for me to get to sleep. I did just buy a THC tincture spray that is supposed to be for sleep. Fortunately it gets me high, unfortunately no sleep however.