Video - "The Capacity to Give up on People"

[sj]

Wasn't sure where to post this, so settled on this General Discussion part of the Child board because it illustrates quite well, both pictorially and in words, how the child mind translates abusive behaviour from care-givers.

It helps remind me and reinforce for me that my mind has been programmed to sell out on myself for the benefit of others who are toxic and that it is totally ok for me to WALK THE * AWAY from toxic people, family, friends or otherwise.

NC and LC are healthy, justifiable choices - I need to tell myself that a lot to quell the toxic shame and guilt.

Hope this is helpful for others, too.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VDKOY0ZTDPI

[Aphotic]

I like this point, about children automatically thinking that "No one and nothing else could be better". It feels even worse when your parents directly affirm that - shaming you for any wish for change.
The video has also reminded me of a rather toxic friendship I recently did 'walk away from'. I felt terrible for a while but, then you realise how better off you are and it feels freeing. I can give myself a pat on the back for that I guess.

Thanks for sharing.

Regards,
Complex.

[Kizzie]

Great video sj    So incredibly sad though to see what we went through psychologically to survive.     I tweeted a link to it because it captures the reasons we respond as we do (i.e., we have to to survive) quite well, why we hang onto the belief (wish) for years, decades even. 

Letting go of that wish was the hardest thing I ever did but it freed me to get on with recovery/healing. 

[Kizzie]

I added the link under "Moving out/On; Going LC/NC" - https://cptsd.org/forum/index.php?topic=6846.new#new.