Free online conference on anxiety and depression

[Snowdrop]

There's another online conference from AVAIYA University this week, this time on anxiety and depression. The Day 1 sessions are now available, and look very interesting:

• Dr. Richard Schwartz: Using Internal Family Systems to Heal Depression & Anxiety
• Lisa Ferentz: How Unprocessed Shame Can Increase Anxiety & Depression in Trauma Survivors
• Dr. Ann Kelley & Sue Marriott: Insecure-Preoccupied Attachment as it Relates to Anxiety

The classes also seem to have free gifts. The first class, for example, has a link to a free meditation on getting to know your inner critic.

Classes are only available to watch for a limited time. You can watch them and see the full schedule here: https://www.avaiya.com/peace/schedule/

[Snowdrop]

Here are some notes on the IFS session with Richard Schwartz.

Parts are like little personalities. Think of a time when you've experienced a dilemma, it's two parts with different views having an argument. The term "parts" is common parlance: "a part of me thinks this" etc.

It's a *good* thing that we have parts. Not a brain problem, shouldn't be demonised.

A burden refers to the experiences and beliefs that a part carries. Events can attach to  parts. They carry them, and it drives them. You can help the part to unburden. There are also legacy burdens, which attach through our families, culture etc.

Anxiety: If you have a scary experience, you don't want to live with that terror, so the part that got hurt gets locked away as an exile. The exile can leak out or explode. Critical parts can attack you for feeling anxious and shame you, so it spirals downwards. Get permission from the anxious part to visit the exile, hold it, comfort it etc. The exile calms down, you can bring it into the present, get it to unburden, and then show it to the critical parts protecting it to show them that it's been healed. The critical parts can then stand down.

Unburdening can be done by yourself or with a therapist. Some people can do it by themselves, other people find it too scary, in which case a therapist or person who's confident can help to reassure the parts. RS said his aim is to bring IFS into education so that you can unburden in the moment and not carry traumas.

You can fully heal the anxious part, and that's what unburdening is about. Parts can't avoid feeling the way that they do when they're frozen in the past.

Depression: a similar story. Can be a very young part that suffered a trauma or felt neglected. Feels sad. The sad part is exiled, a raw, hurting inner child that gets cut off. There can be protector critic parts that take on the energy of the parents. Can be another part that tries to make you not care about anything, and not do anything that might risk triggering. Very dull, flat. To unburden, work with the protector parts first. Honour them for protecting you. Ask the part how old it thinks you are. It's often the age of the young child. Tell the critic part that when you were this age, you needed it to do what it did in order to protect you. It saved you. But that's not the case in the present. Often parts don't know that. When you have permission from the protectors, you can go to the exile part, be with it, go into the scene, and do whatever it needs you to do e.g. talk with the parents. Then take the part to a safe place, unburden and show the protector parts. Ask the protector parts what they want to do now that they don't need to protect the exile.

Shame is another 3 part phenomenon like depression. An exile who feels worthless. A critic who tells you you're worthless. Usually another part that takes you into some activity to distract you e.g. addictions. This can bring the critic back, the exile feels worse, and there's a shame spiral. In a shame spiral, say to yourself "oh, here's the part who feels worthless". It's a part, not you. Separate from it. Feel compassion for it instead of arguing.

Brief mention of the Self. The Self is another part of IFS. It's compassionate. You want the parts to trust the Self.

There was a link to a freebie guided meditation on meeting an inner critic. You can find it here: https://courses.selfleadership.org/sq/ifs_innercriticmeditation_email_avaiya-85315

[Snowdrop]

I've had an email to say that all videos are now available to watch for free until November 23rd 10am PST.

[Kizzie]

Thanks for this Snowdrop!     and