Introduction

Started by Katididit, November 15, 2019, 07:22:56 AM

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Katididit

Greetings,

I have been very happy to find this forum. I'm a 65 year old female, and for the past couple of years I've started to come to terms with how my family history has impacted my life. My father was a narcissist, and my mother displayed some of those characteristics as well. I'm an adult with extreme social anxiety, and am co-dependent in a 40 year marriage to an alcoholic. I've sought help for both conditions, but the pieces of the puzzle didn't fit completely until I read about CPTSD. I relate to so many of the symptoms  - the flashbacks, the memory lapses, the perfectionism, the low self esteem, the desire to escape, etc. etc. It's  been enlightening to realize that traits I considered 'odd' and 'my fault' are actually results of my upbringing. I look forward to learning more in this community, and to use the knowledge as stepping stones in my recovery.

Snowdrop

Hello, Katididit, pleased to meet you! :wave:

I know what you mean about cptsd being enlightening. It explained so many things for me too.

Blueberry

Hello Katididit and a warm welcome to the forum  :heythere:

Three Roses

Hello Katididit, welcome!

Boy do I relate to your post. Violent, disordered father; abusive, enabling mother - married an abusive guy, told myself he wasn't *that* bad (he was), repeated my childhood through my dysfunction - discovered codependency and decided that my awareness would fix everything - it didn't - fast forward to a few years ago when I was diagnosed with ptsd, which led me to discovering this forum where I learned it wasn't ptsd that plagued me but cptsd - found a community of people like me, with symptoms and behavior like mine - talk about a light bulb moment! It's been validating, enlightening, and the first community where I've ever found acceptance. I think you will, too.  :bigwink:

Kizzie

Hi and a warm welcome to OOTS Kati  :heythere:

Snookiebookie2


Not Alone


Chris336

Hi Kati, welcome!
:wave:
Glad you found this forum!

I relate to what you said about how learning about cptsd feels like puzzle pieces coming together to form a larger picture that makes a lot more sense than before.

-"Chris"

Jazzy

Hello Katididit, and welcome. I'm sorry to hear you've had such troubles, but I'm glad that you found us. I hope you find what you're looking for here, and that you make great strides on your healing journey. Take care! :)

bluepalm

Welcome katididit! I'm in my early 70s, discovered cptsd only in the past few years and I agree wholeheartedly with your comment: "It's  been enlightening to realize that traits I considered 'odd' and 'my fault' are actually results of my upbringing." It's been enlightening and freeing for me too. I hope you find OOTS as peaceful and warm a community as I have.

Katididit

Thanks for your encouragement! I am happy to hear you are finding this community helpful. I've always been a bit self critical about the fact it's taken so long to clue in and start taking care of myself. But as a wise person said, "You deserve this". It's never too late. All the best to you!!