Stutter - Deep Blue

[Sceal]

Sending some good thoughts your and your son's way

[Deep Blue]

Happy Birthday to my son. He turned 6 today... poor kid has influenza A on his birthday.  No school, no friends, no cake and ice cream ☹️

I almost lost it today when he threw up the 3rd time from medicine.  He has such a sensitive gag reflex and I'm tired of getting meds spattered on me.

I had a moment where I just wanted to run out of the house and let someone else clean it up.  Then I immediately felt guilty because I know he can't help it.

I know it's my classic trigger, I hate things outside my control.  My son's health falls into that category and i find myself struggling whenever he is sick.  The problem is, he is a kid... kids get sick. 

I wish I was stronger, I wish I could take a deep breath and just be his mom.  The truth is, I just need a little help but my husband is switching jobs next week and no one else wants to be around the germs.  So I'm taking another day off work tomorrow to stay with my son.

I just wish there was a magic wand... I would make my son feel better. I would make myself stronger. I would erase my trauma.  Oh well... wishful thinking I guess 

Goodnight all

[sanmagic7]

   much love and many hugs to you both.

i wish that magic wand was real, too.  that would be the best.

[Not Alone]

Deep Blue, wish you and your son a good night's rest. 

[Deep Blue]

Son is finally better.

I'm fighting an ear infection I'm pretty sure.

Therapy was terrifying this week... I go back Tuesday.  I'm having to continually text my t though... I'm trying not to give in to the temptation to self destruct.

Yeah... feeling down and alone....

My husband starts a new job tomorrow.  We were talking and he wanted to play sports at 7pm tonight.  I said he wasn't gonna do that before his first day was he???

He was a bit snarky. He said, "I don't get nervous about stuff like you do" I'm excited.

I'm trying to let it go.... but it stung a little

[sanmagic7]

yeah, that would sting for sure!  no reason to respond like that to you.

here's some extra strength against self-harming or destructing.     do whatever else you need to do to hang tough, ok?

here with you, holding your hand.  you've got someone by your side. love and hugs, my dear db.

[Not Alone]

Deep Blue,
Sending lots of care to you. 

[Deep Blue]

And now I'm down for the count!!!

Fever, aches, pains, fatigue the works.  I think it's influenza A. 

I went to work but came back home after 3rd period. I HAVE to go to work tomorrow. I'm head proctor for the ACT. I'm going to try to sleep all day today and rally for work tomorrow. I've missed 4 days already this year because my son had influenza A and B. 

Sorry to whine here but I feel terrible

[Snowdrop]

Oh no, sounds awful! I hope you're able to get lots of rest, and you feel better tomorrow.

[Not Alone]

Oh Deep Blue. So sorry. Hope you feel better soon.

[Sceal]

Hey Blue,
I hope you are feeling a little better. That the fever has gone down atleast. It's almost week-end, I hope you can hold on until then and that you can get some much needed sleep and rest over the week-end atleast.

Thinking of you.

[Deep Blue]

Feeling much much better today "physical health" wise.

The fever is gone and my body is recuperating nicely.

My mental health... ha ha that's a whole different story.  I'll write on the therapy portion but let's just say therapy is terrifying.

[sanmagic7]

 

[Hope67]

Hi Deep Blue,
Glad you're feeling better physically.  Sending you a hug 
Hope 

[Deep Blue]

I have a couple week break from therapy and it feels good.