Diagnosis change

[Elphanigh]

I thought I would put this progress here because this place has been such a source of healing and compassion for me. I am always in awe of this community, even if I am currently not posting much in it. You have all are part of my journey, and will continue to be. That being said I thought it important to celebrate this win with you.

Last night, I updated my diagnostic scores and such with my T as we do every six months or so to review my treatment plan and goals. For the first time in my life when I did the Ptsd diagnostic, I no longer met the criteria. This means, currently, that no one can formally diagnose me with C-Ptsd or Ptsd. The healing work I have done in the last 6 years has made this kind of progress. Looking at the symptoms and scores from two and a half years ago I have cut my symptoms in more than half... Therefore, can no longer say I have Ptsd.

This is huge progress but also really strange and mind-boggling to me. I have clung to those labels to explain my experiences and to find a community in my life. Without it, there is a bit of a hole, but mostly I just feel relief and joy to know it is possible. I posted a little more about some feelings I have about it in my journal but do not want to bog this post down with them.

Thank you all for being so warm and welcoming that I can share this here without fear of being excommunicated because of it. 

[Kizzie]

Congrats Elph, that's wonderful!!!                     

[Elphanigh]

Thank you, Kizzie  It is really nice to get to celebrate this with people.

[sanmagic7]

how fabulous!  you've done such tremendous work since you've joined the forum, you deserve to see such positive results.  i can see, tho, where it could also be a bit unsettling - like you said, having had that definition for your issues and symptoms for so long, i can imagine it might seem strange and take a little time getting used to the idea.  well done!   i hope everyone here can eventually reach this goal!  love and hugs, el

[woodsgnome]

Enjoy this moment; you deserve it ... 

[Elphanigh]

Thank you both  I did enjoy the news for a while, but honestly went through a wave of guilt and grief over the last few days. I will spare you the details here but it made it difficult, as I feel guilty for my progress in some ways.  I can still enjoy and celebrate just not as much as I did initially.

[Kizzie]

FWIW when I was at my worst I would read posts about people who were doing well and I would cling to them to see me through the worst of the storm. 

I am so glad for you and thankful you shared because like me others may take hope from your journey. 

[sj]

wonderful! ... well done 
it's reassuring to read stories like this, so thank you for posting it

[Elphanigh]

Kizzie, your words are worth a great deal to me. :big hug: Thank you for sharing and giving me perspective on it. I am hopeful that my successes can inspire people the ways others inspired you.

SJ, it is great to know this is reassuring for you. I had hoped that it would be to someone. Thank you for sharing with me that it was 

[Phoebes]

That's wonderful, Elphanigh- your posts have been a big help to me as well, as you give me hope and encouragement. You're a little ahead of me, but I believe I can get there now, because of you and others here, and finally seeing some progress and improvement. Big hugs and cause or celebration!