How are You Spending the Holidays?

  • 4 Replies
  • 1084 Views
*

Kizzie

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • 9525
    • View Profile
How are You Spending the Holidays?
« on: December 15, 2019, 04:42:47 AM »
Our son is coming home for two weeks and we will be enjoying his company and getting out and about in our new home.  We've lived in the area before but it was 10 years ago so it's fun to go back and see all the old haunts and also check out some new ones.

We did not invite my NPD M so that's some good self-care  :thumbup:

*

Boatsetsailrose

  • Member
  • 1445
  • Hello welcome - so glad I am here and you are too
    • View Profile
Re: How are You Spending the Holidays?
« Reply #1 on: December 20, 2019, 06:06:01 PM »
Good news kizzie
Not inviting npd m sounds a lovely move in self. Care

*

Kizzie

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • 9525
    • View Profile
Re: How are You Spending the Holidays?
« Reply #2 on: December 20, 2019, 06:37:07 PM »
It really is although I confess to a small iota of guilt which I chase away by reminding myself of my needs and those of my family. No matter how good we've (had to) become at managing her NPD, she is a master at diverting attention onto herself.  One year it was a hunt for of all things a hard to find soda to take back to my B just before we were to take her to the airport to go home.  :doh: 

So it isn't just the BIG NPD behav's, it's the constant small things that just add up.  It's stealth narcissism and sounds crazy when you try to explain why something like that would send your BP into the stratosphere. And with her here it also opens the door to other family to introduce their crises (which is inevitable at XMas) by phone/email which she then tries to drag us into .  We just don't want to hear about any of that any more, nope, nope, nope.  :no:

Anyway, it's been a lovely holiday so far without all of that  :) 

*

Boatsetsailrose

  • Member
  • 1445
  • Hello welcome - so glad I am here and you are too
    • View Profile
Re: How are You Spending the Holidays?
« Reply #3 on: December 21, 2019, 03:33:43 PM »
Oh gosh yes indeed...
Explaining behaviours big or small to a lay person isn't easy to fully describe in its emotional and mental impact.
UPD it seems  being only really understood by the ones who experience and have become more awake to the insidious gruelling erosion of sanity!
Staying awake to guilt feelings and working to throw them out of the boat is so important for me and one I'm learning about more how to dissipate with objective and rational self caring logic.

Christmas a time of special celebration and happiness.. Too many were spent miserable for me....
Responsibility lies in keeping the spirit of that alive...

*

Kizzie

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • 9525
    • View Profile
Re: How are You Spending the Holidays?
« Reply #4 on: December 21, 2019, 04:42:10 PM »
I truly hope that holidays will get better each and every year for you Boats  :hug: