I’ve dealt with a chronically painful bladder for 30 years. The formal name for my diagnosis is interstitial cystitis, which is basically a damaged bladder wall that causes constant pain.
Last week new guidelines for treatment of IC came out; and one thing they did was to group people into three categories: bladder-specific pain, pelvic floor pain, and overlapping pain syndrome. The latter was describe as people having other disorders along with IC such as fibromyalgia, TMJ, IBS . . . and also said these patients were also likely to deal with depression and anxiety, which could relate to an overactive central nervous system.
I have depression, anxiety, and OCD. I also have TMJ and possibly have fibro. That description fit me to a T. And when I thought about everything that fed into me having depression and anxiety — childhood bullying, an abusive church, some bad roommate relationships, a son with autism, and these days, just general circumstances — and I got very, very angry.
I haven’t thrown things or screamed at anyone; but I did have a nice, angry talk with God.
Processing this anger is not going to happen overnight. I’m in therapy and this will come up in my next session.