The Coronavirus Pandemic

[Boatsetsailrose]

Hi all how is everyone doing?
Just wanted to report from the UK
Hi all
Just wanted to post about the challenges of social isolation and cfs /fibromyalgia symptoms..
I mean covid or not my symptoms would be happening but I guess what I'm finding challenging is not having the energy to do as much stuff as I'd like...
Maybe doesn't help when I see Instagram /Facebook etc and people are jumping, dancing, singing, creating etc..
I can do bits of things and this is what I need to remember... Its not having the energy to go for a walk or bike which is frustrating.... Too much time in my head..
I seem to spend a lot of time in my mind thinking of all the things I want to do, used to do, it is all whirling around. I'm a creative type but get blocked although I am doing bits...
I guess it all boils down to the same ol same ol I'm not enough, I don't do enough blah blah...
I've just wrote lots of ideas in a journal and will work each day with a little plan and focus so I feel good..
Anyone got any tips experiences on finding it hard to focus, stay with a project, progress in hobbies?
Anyone else with physical health challenges?

[Bach]

I can't with the thing about being better equipped to cope with this because I'm used to being isolated, and with people offering me "comfort" by telling me that a lot of other people are feeling this or doing that right now.  I've realised from all this that on bad days when it seems like everyone I know (i.e., the people I communicate with every day, usually via remote methods) is having a bad day, I rely on there being a world out there where not everyone is traumatised and people are experiencing many different things to give me perspective on what I'm going through.  Yes, of course it's vital to have my people I communicate with who are in this trauma thing with me and can validate and empathise with me, but sometimes it's also really important that I should be able to reach out to my friend in Holland who I only speak to every few months, or check in on that person I knew in high school who posts funny things on Instagram or look at so-and-so's blog about whatever, etc., and have them have things going on in their lives that are totally different from what's happening to me in my circle.  In a way, perhaps, I resent that my sufferings are suddenly mundane and just what "everyone" who isn't actually sick is going through right now, and am angry knowing that if the pandemic went away tomorrow they would feel better while I would just have keep struggling with all my same old crap.

[Kizzie]

I resent that my sufferings are suddenly mundane and just what "everyone" who isn't actually sick is going through right now, and am angry knowing that if the pandemic went away tomorrow they would feel better while I would just have keep struggling with all my same old crap.

Good point Bach.  I hope more people, medical/MH professionals especially, will have a better understanding of the effects/toll of ongoing, life-threating danger which = trauma. Certainly trauma will be more in the foreground then it has been, how soon that fades is anyone's guess, but it is leaving a mark no question so fingers crossed it will mean more treatment/services/support for us in the future. 

[Kizzie]

Anyone got any tips experiences on finding it hard to focus, stay with a project, progress in hobbies?

I'm finding the same thing Boats so am just trying to accept it's a reaction to what we're going thru.  I have found if I make any projects smaller/shorter it helps, also not chastising myself if I can't concentrate as much.  Maybe just keep doing bits and don't watch too many of the active folks on FB, etc who don't have CPTSD?

[Bach]

I resent that my sufferings are suddenly mundane and just what "everyone" who isn't actually sick is going through right now, and am angry knowing that if the pandemic went away tomorrow they would feel better while I would just have keep struggling with all my same old crap.

Good point Bach.  I hope more people, medical/MH professionals especially, will have a better understanding of the effects/toll of ongoing, life-threating danger which = trauma. Certainly trauma will be more in the foreground then it has been, how soon that fades is anyone's guess, but it is leaving a mark no question so fingers crossed it will mean more treatment/services/support for us in the future.

I guess you're more optimistic and less misanthropic than I am, Kizzie, because I'm afraid that things will actually be worse for us after this because there will be all these people who THINK they know what we go through and thus will burden us with their "solutions" and then will blame us when we don't "get over it" like they did, or think they did, or think we should.  I'm going to try to look at it your way instead.

Meanwhile, one of the people dearest in the world to me is sick with what is probably Corona, and she seems to be kind of daring it to kill her.  She's an ocean away, so I couldn't go to her house and knock some sense into her even without social distancing.  I'm scared.  She has serious health problems, so for a long time I have lived with the possibility of her dying, but...now?  Now? 

[Kizzie]

I'm so very sorry to hear about your friend Bach.    Perhaps it might help both you and her to tell her how you feel, how much she means to you and that you are concerned and scared? What was missing for mot of us here was having someone tell us things like this but it's something we can give to those we do care about.

[Bach]

I'm so very sorry to hear about your friend Bach.    Perhaps it might help both you and her to tell her how you feel, how much she means to you and that you are concerned and scared? What was missing for mot of us here was having someone tell us things like this but it's something we can give to those we do care about.

I actually did tell her a few days ago after she started getting sick.  It was really good to be able to do that.  I'm sort of amazed that I was able to feel safe having that conversation, but that's her, that's what she and I are to each other.  I think it helps that we communicate mostly via chat and so I don't have to feel ashamed if I cry.

A couple of years ago she started sharing with me her thoughts of being euthanised because she was in so much pain.  It was awful to hear her say that and I wanted to change the subject or beg her not to do that, but it was really important to me that she have a safe person to talk about it with.  It was very painful, but that she came to me with it was also like an honour that made me feel very special and loved.  So I dealt with it, talked to my therapist about it, and eventually processed it to the point that I figured out a sort of plan for how I would deal with it if it actually came to pass.  Since then, she has come to me with those thoughts from time to time and I have been able to continue to support her, and she has been able to continue to want to live enough not to do it.  So with all this, I suppose that in all the ways I can be, I am prepared for losing her.  I don't want to, though, and definitely not to this.  I have some notion that I'd be more okay with her dying because she chose to than because this overwhelming thing that is already taking away so much takes her too.  Maybe that's not even true.  But I guess it is somewhat comforting to know that if she does go I will not have left anything unsaid.

[Kizzie]

That is such a difficult situation Bach but it sounds like you have helped her and yourself rather than running away from it. In my books that's really brave and what genuine friendship is about.

[Boatsetsailrose]

Hi kizzie /everyone
Yep I've set up 5 mins yoga and 5 mins art a day... This way I mostly do it and often leads to more....
Giving me a sense of achievement and consistency.
Today's been a good day... More energy and did some gardening...
I hope this finds u well and to everyone to find the support they need

[alliematt]

I just now found this thread. :-). Here in the US it's been rough for a number of reasons.  In my household, it's rough on my son because he has autism, and he does not understand completely why he can't go back to his regular routine. 

[Not Alone]

Bach, I'm sorry your friend is sick.  Glad you have told her how you feel. I had a friend who wanted to die because of an illness and pain she experienced. It is really hard to love someone who is in so much pain and who has a desire to die. 

[Kizzie]

Yep I've set up 5 mins yoga and 5 mins art a day... This way I mostly do it and often leads to more....  Giving me a sense of achievement and consistency. Today's been a good day... More energy and did some gardening...

That's great Boats    I've taken to doing chores in small bursts now too - took three days to finish cleaning the bathroom - spreads out the "I hate this chore" thoughts and feelings.

Hey Allie    I've seen similar stories from other parents who have a child with autism.  One woman tweeted that her son was quite upset about not being able to go to the store to pick up groceries  as it was part of their routine so she sets up a store in her kitchen and he's able to 'shop' now. She included a picture of him and he looked quite content and happy.  I was curious if what suggestions there might be on the internet for parents in your situation during the pandemic and there's quite a bit, even some from Sesame Street - https://autism.sesamestreet.org/coping-with-covid/.     

[Bach]

I was curious if what suggestions there might be on the internet for parents in your situation during the pandemic and there's quite a bit, even some from Sesame Street - https://autism.sesamestreet.org/coping-with-covid/. 

I think the suggestions on the Sesame Street page are pretty great for anyone who is struggling with these big scary disruptions.

[alliematt]

I'll check that Sesame Street link.  I just remembered that one of the characters has autism also. 

And yes, I'll bet it'll be good for anyone, autistic or not, having a struggle with disruptions.  Heck, I'm an adult who isn't autistic and I'm struggling with it!

[Kizzie]