Tee’s 2nd try journal* trigger warning *

[Tee]

  thank you snowdrop I approach your thoughts. I'm not sure sure that I have other parts.  I might who knows but as of now I have had two alternate personalities that I actually flip too.  For the most part I re-integrated one of them so now I have hold all of her memories and she keeps me calmer and more level headed. So now as far as I know it's me and Little. 

I'm not sure if that make sense or not and I'm sure I do have the IcR, and others like you wrote about. But Little actually comes out to play she talks to me T and depending on how upset I am when I flip ssomettimes I don't know what is said our what she does when I'm not around.

Thanks for the love and support I will try and see if there's anything I can find to help.

[Snowdrop]

That makes sense, Tee. I think you've done really well reintegrating the other one.

[Tee]

  thanks snowdrop where her and I were flipping she was little Miss perfect and I was more of a hot head like Ying and yang.  But I think I've gotten it figured out now.  I'm really kind of scare to break down the walls between Little and I though I'm not sure when those start coming down I'll be able to function.

[Snowdrop]

Just know that we're here and we've got you.

[Tee]

  thanks snowdrop

[sanmagic7]

i'm in on the 'we've got you' bit, too, dearest tee.  we're not letting go.  love and hugs all around

[Tee]

  thanks San I appreciate it. But if I end up in locked up in a hospital I won't have you guys. Hoping I can go show enough that doesn't happen.

[sanmagic7]

no matter where you are, we are there with you.  right now i'm on the porch with you, and will always be there if you need it.

a few years ago, when i left mexico, i was riding in a car with 2 strangers, pulling all the possessions i could fit on their trailer behind us. i was distraught at having to leave my home, my husband, and the country that gave so much to me.  before i left, i wrote here about how i was feeling about it all, and before i had to pack up my computer, several people from the forum told me they would be with me even as was being driven away from so much i loved.

we were in line for about 2 hours, and when we finally got within sight of the border crossing and the guard house, i imagined a group of people from here about 20 feet away, all walking along as the car inched slowly toward the actual border. there were about 15 of them, they doggedly walked along, keeping pace with the car.  they stood there, their energy giving me the strength i needed to make this life-changing move after 16 years living there.

When we finally hit the guard house and the actual border, while the guard was checking around my stuff in the trailer, it was if all these people surrounded me, holding me up, reassuring me i wasn't alone.  it was one of the most profound experiences of my life, and it happened because i was part of this forum.

i just want you to know, we will be there with you no matter where you are, where you go, whenever you need us.  from experience, i know the words 'we've got you', when spoken by people here, is the truth.  and, we've got you, too, tee. you are not alone.  love and warmly embracing hugs to you.

[Snowdrop]

Here for you no matter what.

[Tee]

  thanks

[Bach]

Sweet Tee, I am here for you, too.  I struggle to speak but I am here listening and caring.

[marta1234]

Hi Tee, I know I don't post much on your journal, but I always have you in mind. I follow all your steps, and as everyone has said before, I'm also here, supporting you and listening to you (wherever you are). I'm sorry you're struggling so much. If I could take some of the pain off of you, I would, because I hear your pain. Sending you love and support, and a warm hug (if it's ok) .

[Tee]

Thanks everyone.

[Snowdrop]

Thinking of you, Tee. Hope you're doing ok.

[Bach]

Me too