Trying to be big when I’m not

[Tee]

Why is it so so hard tto pretend to be Ttee?  When she leaves I I have to pretend I'm her cause she's got kids and a husband that ddont know about mme.  It's hard to to be big though cause I'm llittle Ttee's daughter is almost 8 and and that's lots older than mme.☹️ She makes dinner for mme sometimes pancakes or a sandwich, but I I don't know how to make food.
*trigger warning I I fink *
I I hhate night time cause I I have bbad dreams and and flashbacks of mmmommy Being mean and really mad and mmmy bbbabyssitter pplaying the tickle game. So so I I scared to to sleep. ☹️🥺😢

I wish Ttee would sstopp leaving☹️🥺. She left when she had to do the heimlich on her daughter when she chocking cause it scared her.☹️

[marta1234]

I'm so sorry little Tee. I wish I could help you, take some of the load off and let you rest and breathe. I know I feel half of the time like a little, I just don't want anything and just to stay in bed and without any responsibilities. It's very tiring.
Sending you a gentle hug if it's ok

[Not Alone]

Sweet Little One, of course you can't cook. You are too little to do that. It is very hard to pretend to be big.

I am so sorry that your mommy was mean and mad. That is really scary. Babysitter should NOT have played tickle game. Babysitter was bad, you are not. It is scary to sleep when you have bad dreams. Do you sleep with dolly?

I wish I was with you when you had bad dreams. I would hold you and rock you and talk to you until you felt safe. 

[Tee]

Hi notalone,
*TW*
Sometimes I sleep with mmy dolly.  Mmmy mm mmmommy got really really mad at me when I I played the tickle game she said I was bad and yucky and should go into the trash. If I I messed up or didn't listen or lllet mmy Llittle brother get hurt. Sssssshe would pull my arm really really hard, and spank me a whole bunch.☹️🥺 she didn't like when I cried, she would hot my harder if I I cried.

It sounds like you would be a nice mommy notalone I I think I would like you holding me and rocking and talking to to mme after I I had a bbad ddream.  Thanks for the hug but I I am bbad Th that's why mmmommy doesn't lllove and and is spanks mme all the the time so I I would be bbbetter and not not be bbad anymore.

[Not Alone]

Little One, Your mommy should have protected you from the tickle game. You did not do anything wrong. You are good and precious. It makes me really sad that your mommy hurt you.

I am a mommy. My children are grown up now. When they were little and they had bad dreams, I would listen to the dream (if they remembered it) and hold them and pray for them. When they felt safer I would put a blanket and pillows on the floor by my bed so they could sleep there, next to me. I know I'm not there with you, but if it would help you, you could think about me holding you. I don't think you are bad. You deserve to be held and loved.

[Tee]

  thanks notalone I'll try to think of you and see if it helps.

[Not Alone]

 

[Snowdrop]

Sweet dreams, little one. You're safe, and you deserve to be loved and cherished.

[Tee]

  thanks for the hugs notalone and snowdrop

[Tee]

I ddon't know what to to ttell Tee's H.  He's asking why I I ddon't like mmy mmmommy, and if he is ggoing to bbe cclose tto mme anytime soon.☹️😔
It scares mme to to try to ttalk to him I I ddon't want him to to know me. I I ttry to just watch shows and rrest when she leaves bbut she was gone a lot today. 😢

[Snowdrop]

I'm sorry it's scary, dear little one. Resting sounds like a good idea. I don't know what else to suggest at the moment, but I've been thinking of you. I want you to know that I hear you and I care about you.

[Tee]

Thanks snowdrop

[Not Alone]

I've been thinking of you too, Little One. 

[Tee]

  mmy head really really hurts☹️😖😭 it it feels like it's gggoing to explode. As soon as Ttee got home from work she left.  I ffeel sick mmy head hurts so much
Hi notalone

[Bach]

  Hello friend  I am here too!