Did unBPM molest me? TW-CSA

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gcj07a

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Did unBPM molest me? TW-CSA
« on: July 18, 2020, 04:32:16 PM »
Why I am posting here is because I am curious as to whether SA is something typical of Borderlines? Or, at least, not uncommon?

***TW--CSA***

I posted on the SA forum about a memory I recovered a few days ago in EMDR therapy of my unBPM (with whom I am NC) molesting me when I was elementary aged (I am male). While I would have readily described my relationship with M as covert/emotional incest, I never suspected physical SA until a few days ago. For context: I know my M was physically and emotionally abused as a child and I have suspected for years that she was also sexually abused. Anyhow, any clarity out there? Thanks!

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Slim

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Re: Did unBPM molest me? TW-CSA
« Reply #1 on: July 18, 2020, 06:19:34 PM »
You are describing very painful feelings. Uncovering your past, happens slowly. We are here to support you, when you feel confused, unsure, and in need of some reassurance...which we all need.
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Blueberry

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Re: Did unBPM molest me? TW-CSA
« Reply #2 on: July 18, 2020, 07:53:51 PM »
I have no idea if CSA is typically done by Borderlines, but CSA along with other types of abuse does thrive in families where there are problems, secrets, power games, abuse of power and all that type of thing. Apparently there is way more CSA around than people commonly think.

I'm female and CSA was done to me by my M, so mothers do it too. I think M probably had some of the CSA done to her which she did to me, but that's not an excuse for her. Other people who were abused manage to break the cycle. I cannot imagine making up the memories I have, you know? There's quite enough 'going on' without any inventions. So, if your memories are resurfacing, then they are resurfacing. They happened to you.

We are here to support you.

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Slim

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Re: Did unBPM molest me? TW-CSA
« Reply #3 on: July 19, 2020, 08:18:14 AM »
I agree with Blueberry.
There are lots of reasons why people abuse others. But CSA is very difficult to understand, and I have a blind spot about it. I don't really know people's motivations to cross that line: some are mentally ill, some have many generations of incest, some are sociopaths.
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