Something I Want Others to Know About CPTSD is ...

Started by Kizzie, August 15, 2020, 04:18:20 PM

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Kizzie

I thought I'd start a thread in which we speak about what we need/want/think/feel about having CPTSD to advocate for ourselves and raise awareness. 

You are welcome to substitute the word "others" to something more specific such as "my family/children/friends/therapist.


Kizzie

Something I want others to know about CPTSD is ....

... it is not about being disordered in some way, it's about responding to traumatic stress in ways I had to to get through, being injured psychologically and physically, and in need of supportive, compassionate and effective treatment.

sanmagic7

. . .

i don't keep wanting to relive my past - it continues to bait and trap me in my present.  if i could just let it go, i would. 

sigiriuk

Something I want others to know about CPTSD is ....it is very hard to speak out, because of feelings of shame.

Bach

Something I want people to know about CPTSD is that it's real and has a cause and I am not delusional, malevolent or dangerous.

findingpeace2018

Something I want people to know about CPTSD is that it is not a sign of weakness.  In fact, its proof of my strength.  Its how I survived everything meant to destroy me.

reefdv

Something I want people to know about CPTSD is that it gives me the ability to detect deception, like a Geiger Counter; very sensitive to *! So be straight with me or else!

Kizzie

... how tiring it is to deal with the symptoms of CPTSD at the same time as being a parent, spouse, employer/employee, student, community member, friend, family member...

rainydiary

I want others to know how hard I have to work to participate in my life and with others.

Bach

Quote from: rainydiary on August 16, 2020, 03:31:56 PM
I want others to know how hard I have to work to participate in my life and with others.

Yes! This all day every day.

woodsgnome

Something I'd like others to know about c-ptsd:

Don't assume it's at all like ptsd. It can be, but not always, and its name is only an attempt to generalize what might include multiple damaging traumas.

I'm being honest about what happened, and I need the same sort of response. Listen to what I'm really saying, without judgement. The worst is when you pretend you're listening but then treat me as if I'm too damaged for you to want to be around.

I'm not a damaged victim, though judgemental sorts of people -- even if they consider themselves as 'caring' -- can make me feel like one. I'm sensitive, yes; but also very curious about some things that badly hurt me and how I can live in spite of that. These hurts were senseless to begin with, and their results can be incredibly hard to deal with even decades later.

Please, I don't need false comfort or pretend analyses or top-down sorts of advice. I only need honest listening. And a response as if I'm human, not some weak simpleton who couldn't handle life.

findingpeace2018

I second woodsgnome's statements.   What an intelligent take on our suffering.  Thank you so much woodsgnome.  That was so comforting to read.

Blueberry

#12
I want others to know that it only looks as if I have all this free time on my hands. When I'm not working full-time (most of the time) or not working at all (some of the time), I need my time and my energy for me and for my healing. It's not a non-stop holiday. And I most certainly do not have the time or energy to help others, especially not to take on their volunteer jobs or around the house-and-garden jobs for which they 'don't have time due to work demands'.

Healing from cptsd is work, you just don't make any money out of it directly.

In fact it's really hard work.

rainydiary

#13
I wish others would know my reactions are more than "being anxious" - I am actively rexperiencing the emotional overwhelm of my trauma.   

I wish others knew how my brain doesn't give me a break even in sleep. 

Blueberry

#14
Quote from: rainydiary on August 17, 2020, 11:08:35 AM
I wish others would know my reactions are more than "being anxious" - I am actively rexperiencing the emotional overwhelm of my trauma.   

:yeahthat:

In a similar bent, cptsd is not 'just depression' either, it's way more. In fact being in one of my severe depressive phases is in itself an active reexperiencing of the only way I could regularly deal in childhood with abuse and neglect, especially emotional abuse and neglect.