Master of my Seas Journal

[Armee]

I'm so happy to hear you are still feeling very strong and are working to be unapologetically yourself. 

[Papa Coco]

Your words here are inspiring and touching, Finding and embodying your authentic self is the greatest gift you can possibly give to yourself, and to the world around you.

I liken it to us here being superheroes, giving our lives over to protecting and helping others, while wearing disguises so no one knows our true identities. We're not always loved for who we are, but for what we can do to help others.

Noble as that sounds, superheroes are shielded. At the end of the day, they take off their capes and masks and sit alone, knowing nobody even knows who they are.

There is a lot of life and energy in your post as you talk about how you can see a more adult, more evolved reflection of yourself in the mirror. You're giving yourself permission to draw and listen to music and just be yourself, doing what you enjoy doing, rather than once again putting on the mask and cape and looking for people to help...people who, in many cases, need to start doing those things for themselves.

I pray, every day, all day, now for only one thing: I want to be happy. Period. No conditions, no suggestions. As I focus on only one thing, becoming authentically happy, my eyes and ears are picking up on messages all around me, telling me in various ways, that becoming unapologetically who I really am, is where I will find that happiness.

At 62 years old, I'm still pretty confused as to who I really am. I don't easily see the difference between my authentic self and my superhero self. I struggle to separate responsibilities from pleasures. Sometimes I'm helpful to others because I truly want to be. Other times, I'm helpful to others because I feel obligated. Fear of being judged as a bad person because I didn't help someone do something they could have done for themselves. I like being helpful, but sometimes I help under duress. Not as much now as I used to, but I'm still separating my true self from my superhero persona.

I'm glad you didn't wait to be my age before starting to accept yourself for who you really are. I hope you get to live many decades without having to put on the cape and mask anymore. Even at my age, it's not too late, but when it comes to finding inner joy and happiness and self acceptance, the sooner we can get started, the longer we get to enjoy not having to wear the cape anymore.

I'm excited for you.