Are you progressing...? I'll do my best to stop you! -How I am dealing with this

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SunnyDays

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Whenever I mention that I'm about to get a job, the two narcs that lives with me (8 years now). Mother and grandmother. They always try to sabotage, create a crisis, do anything to stop my independence.
I'm going to be strong. I have a person that believes in me (besides myself now).


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marta1234

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I’m sorry you’re going through this, SunnyDays. I haven’t experienced this (or maybe I have, just forgot) but I can feel your pain and anger. Sending you much support, and congrats on getting a job  :cheer: and feeling more independent. Sending you a :hug: (if it’s ok)
« Last Edit: October 17, 2020, 01:08:36 PM by marta1234 »

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SunnyDays

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Sending you a :hug: (if itís ok)

Yes, of course it is OK. I've found that the abusers tends to isolate us when we're being targeted. So any word of encouragement is of great value, always.   I will try to get the jobs no matter what, evading the unnecessary rocks on the path. In my example, it was not allowing me to have an speed internet connection (as silly but harmful as it sounds).
These days, in many situations a stable decent internet connection is a must, but they won't let me... anyway. Based on several past experiences, today was internet the excuse, in other moments it could be anything.
They certainly try to stop growth and create a co-dependence situation. And they certainly feel (very high levels of) jealousy. Even after all these years it amazes me. 

Again, thanks for your kind words.

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Violet Magenta

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Hi Sunny Days, I've experienced similar! Sending supportive vibes your way. I've noticed that if I set boundaries, or grow, I get a lot of pushback from the narcs in my life. It can be a subtle putdown, or a big "crisis" to derail what I'm doing. There are SO many forms it takes.

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Pioneer

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Hi SunnyDays! I can so relate to what you are saying about the sabotage. I'm glad that you have someone who believes in you - that's so important! I wish you all the best!  :hug:

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dreamriver

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I relate, too. Big hug to you! :hug: I've experienced similar. Those steps to independence are the best you'll ever take in your life!!!!