Permanently in flight mode

[Snookiebookie2]

This morning, whilst working I realised I just didn't want to be there. My main motivation was to get through my work fast, so I could get away.  I realised that I'm constantly afraid at work and I'm in flight mode. And because of this I'm not focused on my job.

Because I'm afraid I miss things and rush.  I feel panicked.  I know that my job would be done best in a calm manner, with all my attention.

When i spot mistakes, due to lack of attention and panic, it makes things worse. Vicious cycle

I only work 5 hours a day.  How can I break this cycle.   Any tips would be welcome.

Thanks

[Bermuda]

I'm sorry that you feel that you're always in flight mode that must be very draining for you. I can really relate to this feeling of being in a desperate cycle to catch up and do well all the time, and unfortunately I don't perform well under pressure. I was given advice from a therapist to not pressure myself. Five hours is a lot, maybe not for others, but we are valuable just as we are. We don't have to be relaxed when it's not possible for us. We can make mistakes and that's ok.

I know I've internalized every criticism I've ever been given, and just realising that has been helpful for me, just knowing that the words in my head are not my own. I think the key to easing the cycle (I haven't broken it), is just realising when you are blaming, shaming, or stressing yourself, instead of trying to stop the feeling and thoughts themselves or the. I guess in a way trying to control everything adds just more stress and flightiness.

I hope that can comfort you a bit. I always feel bad when i respond to people and worry that am coming across preachy or taking up too much air, but I also realise those are not MY words either.

[Kizzie]

Snookie, one of the things that helped me to deal is Cognitive Behavioural Therapy.  It doesn't solve everything of course, but it did help me challenge what I was thinking in situations when I did not feel safe.

One of the main things I learned was that not everyone is actually judging me.  CBT didn't do much to help me understand why I felt so judged mind you, but it did help sort out those who were and were not criticizing me. That helped bring down the flight response enough so that I could be more comfortable and see more clearly why I went into flight mode,  and what triggered it in the past and today. 

Hope this is of some help