How to navigate this situation?

Started by Bermuda, February 04, 2021, 09:40:49 AM

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Bermuda

I don't know if this is the correct place to put this.

I have a question. I am studying some foreign languages. I have an assignment I have to do in one of my university courses. It requires be to read a novel in this language and essentially write a book report. Since it's in a difficult language it's highly engaged reading involving lots of translation and such. The problem is the book that has been selected for me includes themes that I find very difficult. It's a suspense/mystery novel.

What do I do? Do I read that book and deal with the consequences? Do I avoid reminders and don't read the book? Do I message the professor and explain why I'm prefer not to do the assignment? Then I have to face her every day looking at me and may possibly be asked to provide "proof".

What do I do?  :'(

Alter-eg0

Yeah, that sucks.

I'd just ask the professor if you could be assigned a different book, because it contains content matter that you're not comfortable with. No need to go into detail, and no reason why the prof would ask for "proof". Honestly, most prof's have better things to do ;) (says me as a teacher).

And if for whatever reason she says no, well, I guess you could see it as an interesting experiment. You already know how to avoid. Maybe an experiment in expanding your window of tolerance, or whatever. I'm sure your creative brain will have some idea's ;)

Good luck.

Blueberry

Quote from: Alter-eg0 on February 04, 2021, 12:54:10 PM
I'd just ask the professor if you could be assigned a different book, because it contains content matter that you're not comfortable with. No need to go into detail
:yeahthat:

I constantly fear somebody asking me for "proof" of this, that or the other but it's based on actions of people like FOO in my childhood who asked for proof in order to gaslight etc. Not everybody acts like my FOO. Still, I find myself explaining things when nobody has even asked, so I do understood your worry :yes:    I think you even could repeat "I'm just not comfortable with the topic" rather than going into detail. 

fwiw I find reading and writing things in a foreign language creates some emotional distance for me. But this may well not be the same for everybody.

Good luck!  :)

Bermuda

Thank you both for your replies. I suppose telling the professor is the correct thing to do. What you are saying Blueberry makes a LOT of sense. I have never really thought about it, but I am a massive over-explainer.

Maybe it would create emotional distance. I'm not really sure. The thought of talking to the professor is causing me a lot of anxiety, so much so that I am considering dropping the course. I realise that is CPTSD talking. Even knowing that I can't seem to take control and keep on track.

It seems so trivial, and here I am in tears over an assignment.

Blueberry

Bermuda, it's not at all trivial! :hug:  'just' doing something is often really really difficult to impossible for me! That's cptsd for you. It's not an easy thing to have to deal with day in, day out, and actions which are quite simple for people without cptsd are not all simple for all of us.

I would probably have anxiety in your situation too; I usually have anxiety when I have to ask anybody in a position of power for something. I hope you can find a way not to drop out. But I'm standing with you however things work out and sending you support, care and compassion.  :hug: