[TW?] My thoughts on over-eating/weight management

[Jazzy]

smindia1981, it sounds like you're taking a good approach. It's great how you are trying something new after identifying that what you have done in the past has not lead to the results you desire.

I see a lot of self-awareness in your post, which is very impressive. It sounds like you have most of this figured out already! I'm sure that as you begin to trust yourself more, and take small steps based on that trust, you will soon start seeing positive results.

The minor details, or small whispers, are extremely important to me. One thing you have written here which really stands out to me is this:

At times I am hungry, which makes me angry as if I should not be hungry,  which in turn drives me to eat sugary stuff, and then it just keeps going.

This is perfectly understandable. I'm not sure where, but I wrote somewhere that I don't think it is good to feel hungry either. To me, that means I am suffering from a lack of nutrition. However, never feeling hungry is not a very realistic goal for me.

I wonder if instead of being angry about feeling hungry, as a small step, you could try feeling angry about eating sugary stuff so often. It's okay when I feel a bit hungry! I just eat what my body is asking for, then everything is good a few minutes later!

It's okay if you can't tell what your body is asking for quite yet. From what you have shared about yourself, I'm positive that you have the knowledge to ensure you have a sufficient amount of nutrition. Slowly combining this with a replacement "feel better" activity was very helpful to me. It sounds like training is not a good choice for you right now, which is totally fine! Hopefully you can find something else which works better for you right now. Musical activities are very helpful for me too.

Hopefully something in this is helpful to you. If not, please don't feel pressured to follow any of it.

I'm glad you're a good weight, and working to improve your eating habits and how you feel about yourself, as well as reducing your anxiety. That's great work! 

<3 Jazzy

[Jazzy]

smindia1981:

I apologize for the errors in my previous post. You know your own body much better than I do, so I'm sure what you wrote is correct:

I just go and eat something sweet to ease the anxiety

From what you're saying, your body needs to ease the anxiety. If I were you, I would focus on that. When you find a way to ease the anxiety besides eating sugar, one small step at a time, the changes you want to make regarding eating will come much easier.

Thanks for your understanding, and all the best with this!

<3 Jazzy

[smindia1981]

@jazzy, thank you for your detailed response. I appreciate it.
No errors in your post though, if there were I couldn't find.
I am doing a but.of.wjat you have written.  I eat what I am craving and then.its better. When judgement is replaced with acceptance,  it seems to.be fine
I feel.this could be a good thing for.me
I started telling myself  'It's okay to be hungry.'
'You can eat whatever you want.'
And I do eat.
It feels better. I do.feel.afraid that I will gain weight but I can live with that better maybe.
I have been a hypocrite all.my life, always preaching self love and acceptance to my clients but never considered myself be worthy of it.
I feel good when I write, I am working on doing more of it. I like to run, but I tend to overdo it so as of now, I have taken a break from.it.  yoga feels better whenever I can, no pressure as I again tend to overwhelm myself and then just stop doing it.
I agree with you that feeling hungry and then trying to.control.it is not.a good place to be.
Thank you again for your kind words of encouragement and support. 🙏

[Jazzy]

It sounds like you are beginning to find peace Smindia. That is wonderful! I'm so happy for you! 

I do.feel.afraid that I will gain weight but I can live with that better maybe.

Wow, this is extremely impressive! To me, this says that you are putting your emotional needs ahead of your physical needs. While it is heartbreaking things are so bad that a choice must be made, I am confident this is the right one.

I'm sure that your physical health (weight management goals) will improve along with your mental health. I have seen that in my own life, as well as the live of others.

I wish it were easier, but I think it is likely that you are right. Eating more tends to lead to adding more weight. However in my experience, once I learned (felt better about) it was okay to eat and to look after myself, I was able to eat less at a time, and more precisely of what I needed.

This is when the weight really began to drop off for me. I have lost 50 pounds off my stomach this year so far, as well as added a few inches on to my arms.

I'm very encouraged by the success I have had by taking care of my mental health first, then applying my logic and determination to my physical health. I'm sure everyone's numbers will be different, which is fine.

When judgement is replaced with acceptance,  it seems to.be fine

I fully agree; this is such a powerful step! I find it's okay to want things to be better, but in order to make them better I need to accept them, not judge them.

Thank you for sharing. I'm glad you are feeling better about yourself, as well as taking action to treat yourself better! 

<3 Jazzy

[Jazzy]

I have lost 50 pounds off my stomach this year so far, as well as added a few inches on to my arms.

The reason I wrote this is to show the results that came to me from following my method. Everyone is unique, so I expect my method will not work in every situation. I'm sure the results will vary, if nothing else.

However the key point is how I developed my method. I'm no dietitian or trainer or chef or anything official. I just paid very close attention to what my mind and body was telling me, then studied to find a way to act on what I was told.

I fully believe this is the key anyone can use to make the changes they want in their own life.

[smindia1981]

@jazzy,  indeed I do feel I am at a better point.  Thank you for acknowledgement and appreciation.  Means a lot.
I am very happy for you. That you were able to lose the weight by focusing on mental health first. I now feel that is the right way forward.
Instead of constantly trying to control and manage cravings it's better to eat what you want and then slowly allow your body and mind to figure out what you really need.
Thank you again for your kind words and support.
🙂🙏

[smindia1981]

I have lost 50 pounds off my stomach this year so far, as well as added a few inches on to my arms.

The reason I wrote this is to show the results that came to me from following my method. Everyone is unique, so I expect my method will not work in every situation. I'm sure the results will vary, if nothing else.

However the key point is how I developed my method. I'm no dietitian or trainer or chef or anything official. I just paid very close attention to what my mind and body was telling me, then studied to find a way to act on what I was told.

I fully believe this is the key anyone can use to make the changes they want in their own life.

I agree, that listening to your body and then eating will slowly help us reach our physical goals. I have done everything else and it doesn't amount to anything.  It didn't help me get to a place where I was happy.
My binging didn't stop.
The more I listen to my body, allow it to make some mistakes, eat some stuff that it craves to manage some difficult feelings, and overall being aware and being kind, I believe will help me in the long run.