Gidday from NZ

[combatwombat]

Gidday all!
I'm a dude born + bred in New Zealand, living in the Hawke's Bay currently.  Also a computer consultant/ programmer, mainly on PHP, and ran a forum for OOTB believers in Christ for a few years. Yeah, I'm one of them, too.
Having always been shy and geeky, I wondered why. As I entered my fourth decade, everything went south for me; inexplicable pain in my back, severe depression, suicidal ideation, marital issues. Eventually, through some help from a Psych, I discovered CPTSD, and slowly things have started to make sense, and slowly, very slowly, the trauma of my childhood has made it's way into my consciousness. At the moment I am reading Pete Walker's book, and it helps.
That's a very short intro to me! 
Thanks @Kizzie for running this show. I know it's a lot of work!

[Not Alone]

Welcome to OOTS. Thanks for introducing yourself. 

I'm wondering what OOTB stands for?

[Armadillo]

Hi!

Welcome to the forum and I'm glad things are starting to make sense. That's been important for me in healing.

[combatwombat]

Thanks all.
@notalone : "I'm wondering what OOTB stands for?" Sorry, it was a slip to not explain that better; 'Out Of The Box', as in removed from organized religion. Yeah, spiritual abuse is part of my history with the church, but I found another 'church' outside the walls, one that is more reliant on faith in the journey because they haven't got someone else telling them what to do every step of the way.

[Not Alone]

 

[bluepalm]

Welcome combatwombat to this kind and precious community, which has been an important source of validation and support for me. I hope it proves to be so for you too.

The realisation that I was affected by complex trauma dating from infancy dawned on me slowly too, over a long period, and with that realisation life started to make so much more sense. Pete Walker's book and webpage were enlightening for me. As was Bessel van der Kolk's book, 'The Body Keeps the Score'.

I'm not sure if you're aware that here in Australia we have a centre of excellence for CPTSD called The Blue Knot Foundation, which has excellent resources for furthering understanding, which you may find helpful too.
bluepalm