Can you be triggered if you have not been traumatised?

[Blueberry]

If somebody says to you "I was triggered by what you said" but she has never mentioned anything about being traumatised herself despite knowing about me having cptsd, is she misunderstanding what triggers are? Could she being feeling upset or angry or confused or similar and think that's what being triggered is? But actually does not know the finer points of overwhelm etc? Or is this a form of minimising my reactions and problems (for want of a better word)? A sort of jumping on the bandwagon? Or something else entirely?

I'm interested in others' opinion on this. Partially because I might be being overly picky on definitions.




This article https://www.healthline.com/health/triggered reinforces some of what I've been told in the past e.g. that trauma doesn't always lead to triggers, which could be similar to not everybody getting traumatised e.g. not everybody in the same earthquake or car accident will be. The article is not actually primarily about this particular aspect of triggers.  To be fair I maybe ought to look for an article that says the opposite 

[Snowdrop]

I've noticed more and more people say triggered when they mean upset, annoyed or offended.

On Urban Dictionary, it says the popular slang definition for triggered is "when someone gets offended or gets their feelings hurt". I think this trivialises the actual definition, which it also lists.

[woodsgnome]

This topic touches on one of the trickiest places to navigate -- making sense of the senseless. And it's hard to understand or describe some things that can cut into the deepest core of one's being.

Hmm -- I guess what I just wrote indicates what 'trigger' means for me -- an incident or person that reminds me of very deep hurt which still affects me. Still it's very slippery, and I've noticed some of my own trauma isn't understood no matter how I try to craft words which would describe the trauma I could be recalling. 'Trigger' or 'trauma' are among many definitions that defy universal application to all people in all places.

Some of its current usage of these words seems to have evolved as a breezy shortcut to a quick definition; very handy in a soundbite society, reflecting a culture that would rather avoid its worst aspects, such as how people treat each other, even supposed 'loved ones' (another terms loosely tossed around; which can still 'trigger' me).

For me, I guess I tend to step back a bit at these sorts of terms. Which is to say what society defines as trigger or trauma will not necessarily apply or reflect my own experiences with or about what truly injured my being. So it comes down, mostly, to listening to my heart.

I think this happens with lots of words. Certain words can trigger me. Then again others hearing the same word might not bat an eye or have any reaction. For me, having survived much abuse in religious settings, so-called nice 'holy' words can be deeply triggering; but not for others who didn't have the same background.


I've developed a sort of solo vocabulary to deal with what some of these terms really mean for me. It's still a squishy topic, subject to all sorts of innuendo and of course misunderstanding. Like so much of this, it's a work-in-progress with few solid answers that apply to everyone in all circumstances.

Ultimately, different sorts of people will have varying criteria and values affecting what triggers them (or even what the term means) and how they respond.

[woodsgnome]

Sorry, one little tidbit I'd like to add to my post above.

That is, there's also the 'absent' sort of trigger. What I'm referring to is those times when i run into something I didn't ever experience and have deep regrets that can trigger lots of inner turmoil, verging on tears for what wasn't meant for me.

The simplest example -- just seeing basic love being expressed; usually in a child/parent setting, but it can vary. Seeing these heartfelt expressions of love can hurt as deep or deeper than things that are reminiscent of things that did happen.

Okay -- this says it better:       

[Jazzy]

Hey Blueberry,

Everyone makes good points here. You are right that those who are not traumatized are not triggered in the same way. This is one of the challenges of using words which are not defined in detail. So much of language is left out, because we all assume on some level that the other people around us know how to fill in the blanks.

Let's use "I feel triggered" as an example.

This is fine, anyone can correctly say this because it is only them expressing their feelings. What is unsaid is the important part. This is likely the unsaid part:

Trauma Survivor: "My survival response has been triggered more strongly than it normally is due to this event."
Non-Trauma Survivor:" "That loud noise triggered my anxiety levels to spike."

I hope this helps clarify things. I'm really picky on definitions too, because I think the things we don't say mean more than the things we do.

[Blueberry]

Thank you all for your responses. woodsgnome, I understand being triggered by an absence of something or rather being triggered by the existence of something which was absent in the years I lived with FOO.

I actually asked my T last time what he thought and he said that "trigger" is being used increasingly in a non-trauma context. The usage he and I are both referring to is not an English language one, although it sounds the same in English according to what Snowdrop quoted from Urban Dictionary. I agree that it's trivialising.

It was 'friend' no. 2 who said that I had triggered her. My T suggested I ask what was triggered. I guess she might then feel heard but otoh it might be better to let sleeping dogs lie and only ask if she ever says it again. I really don't think she has cptsd, though there could be some intergenerational trauma in her FOO but if she's not looking at that otherwise which she isn't then I think referring to being triggered is a mis-nomer. IMO. Especially since she came out and said she doesn't like the way I treat FOO.