Caring without enmeshment

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Cottonanx

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Caring without enmeshment
« on: April 19, 2015, 01:39:30 AM »
The friends who help me the very most are the ones who love me, but don't get enmeshed in me. They show concern without taking it upon themselves, in other words.

Sometimes I still feel alone, when all of them are busy and I just want someone to talk to me in a comforting voice and tell me I'm not horrible.  :hug:

Still grateful for folks who can care just the right amount but not too much.

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Sandals

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Re: Caring without enmeshment
« Reply #1 on: April 19, 2015, 03:33:23 AM »
:hug: What great perspective you have. The other things I'm hearing that weren't said is that they didn't deny your feelings (validation) and helped you feel connected without putting the guilt of making you feel a burden (community and respect). It's really great you have good people in your life.

Have you started any inner child work? That is a place where you can step in and fill the need inside you for love and reassurance. Your little one is asking and you can let her know she is loved and perfect just as she is.

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Cottonanx

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Re: Caring without enmeshment
« Reply #2 on: April 20, 2015, 03:28:29 PM »
I don't know anything about inner child work. Can you point me towards some resources?

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keepfighting

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Re: Caring without enmeshment
« Reply #3 on: April 20, 2015, 05:16:54 PM »
The friends who help me the very most are the ones who love me, but don't get enmeshed in me. They show concern without taking it upon themselves, in other words.

Still grateful for folks who can care just the right amount but not too much.

They sound like wonderful friends. Those are the kind of people around which you can be yourself without having to be constantly worried about guarding your personal boundaries or worried about your words getting twisted around and used against you.... Those kind of friendships are the best.  :thumbup:

About Inner Child work: There's a sub-forum devoted to IC work in the CPTSD and Us section of OOTS. Lots of tips and information there.  :yes:
« Last Edit: September 02, 2016, 06:15:40 PM by Kizzie »