Learning to heal, Larry's journey

[Chart]

Nine days! Awesome! Sorry to hear about the nightmares though. Maybe try some positive visualization when you close your eyes for sleep. Just five minutes of thinking about a pleasant place, beach, forest, mountains... Might help the shift out of the nightmares. Hope so!

[Larry]

i had some drinks saturday night,  ended up baker acted again,   i don't know where to go from here,   was prescribed zoloft again,  but i know i wont take it

[Chart]

So if I understand correctly you went two weeks without a drink. That's great! Your getting more control. It's slow but it's coming!
Sending hugs and support!
 

[Larry]

thank you....

[Armee]

 

I wish it were easier to get the motivation to do what needs to be done to get better.

[NarcKiddo]

It does seem like you are managing longer and more regular periods without a drink, which is good. From my own experience with alcohol I know it can be really tough to limit consumption once you start. It's a big challenge, but you have also been managing that from recent posts I have read. It's a really hard road and we don't always remember the progress when we have a setback. So I wanted to mention the progress and applaud you for it.

 

[Larry]

thank you armee and narckiddo,     holidays are hard for me,  and this 4 of july wasn't any different,   I feel better now that it is behind me.  I really want to do this without meds,   not sure if it will work,  but I am trying

[dollyvee]

Hi Larry,

I remember when you started posting a few years ago (wow, how time flies) and you had your first appointment with your t, and when they suggested to you that you might have a problem with alcohol, you found it really hard to take. I wonder now, seeing your struggles over the past few years with alcohol, if maybe the next steps to getting better would be to admit to yourself that maybe there is a problem, and it's something you need help with? I'm going by what you've posted on the forum and this is by no means all your thoughts, actions, what you've been through, so that thinking may have changed. But if it hasn't, then saying or calling someone to say, I'm going through a lot right now and I really don't want to drink might be the next step because it is a problem. I know you said the people at AA were supportive.

Sending you support,
dolly

[Larry]

thank you dolly     
  I feel good today,  ready to move forward,   i know alcohol does not work with my mental state,  doing my bet to avoid it.  Today is 7 days without a drink,  I went 10 days,  then had some drinks and went to the crisis center.  obviously need to stay away from alcohol.   I re planted a few things outside today,  trying to find motivation to get out of the house,  maybe go to the gym. 

[Little2Nothing]

Larry, 7 days without alcohol is a big step. Keeping busy helps take your mind off things. 

[NarcKiddo]

Yes, 7 days is great, Larry. I'm glad you're feeling good. I always find the gym very helpful in so many ways and from what you have posted before you get a lot out of it too. So I hope you found the motivation to go. Or at least to do something, since you said you wanted to do that.

[dollyvee]

Congrats on Day 7 Larry  I hope you're able to find what you need to do, and the motivation, to stop repeating the patterns in your life with alcohol. 

Sending you support,
dolly

[Chart]

Congrats Larry!
Each morning you wake up think about how good you feel because you didn't have a drink the night before. You really do feel better! Keep going, it get's easier.

[AphoticAtramentous]

7 days is incredible! I am rooting for you, Larry! Your progress makes me hopeful in defeating my own unwanted habits too.

Regards,
Aphotic.

[Larry]

thank you everyone !   I have been doing ok,   i drank a lot friday night,   i don't know why,  but today is day 3.   i know i need help,  i am trying to get back in therapy.  I have hydroxyzine,  and it seems to help a little,   but i don't take it like i should.   
I get depressed and lonely,    still having a hard time feeling accepted.   not sure why it is so hard to feel like i fit in somewhere