Learning to heal, Larry's journey

[Hope67]

Hi Larry,
I'm glad to hear that your session went ok. 
Hope 

[Armee]

I'm glad you recognized the drinking as a form of self-harm, and that having that frame is helping you understand it better.

Hooray for feeling less anxious and hypervigilant!!!

[owl25]

That sounds like it went well! That's wonderful. I am glad you didn't feel the anxiety afterwards. You're off to a good start with your therapy 

[Larry]

thank you guys !  i feel so much better,  i hope this can last !

[dollyvee]

Hi Larry,

Sounds like some very positive experiences and realizations - congrats!

dolly

[Larry]

thank you Dolly !

[woodsgnome]

Something you said registered for me, so I'll share that here.

It's in response to your little remark post-therapy session. You said: "i felt like i didn't get anything out of that session." Then you sort of slid in the thought that you did notice less anxiety.

I think that speaks to the essence of how therapy usually works. In order to be effective, it has to almost seem as an undercurrent in a process of developing your new outlook.

In other words, it's not always going to be some spectacular or dramatic fireworks that produces the new outlook. Sometimes it may take weeks to realize that yes, there's a slow response to the therapy that's happening, and it feels okay, or at least what I seem to need.

So I hope you can stay the course, realizing this undercurrent will support you. Even if there are those spectacular moments of realization ahead, you're already starting to find your new way. 

[Larry]

thank you woodsgnome,  this is my first experience with therapy,  kind of did not know what to expect.  next session is 2 weeks,  my T is taking a week off,   I only had 2 drinks yesterday,   i feel pretty good today.  still having a hard time sleeping.  but i have been dealing with that for years.  i really want to go join the gym today.  i have been putting it off for 2 months.  i think if i could make it a habit,  i would not want to drink as much.. 

[Armee]

Wow! Only 2 drinks is great Larry! 

I bet having an automatic place to go like a gym instead of your bar would really help on those days you want to do something but don't know what to do. I also bet there's a community there too.

[Larry]

I did it !  i joined the gym this morning !  worked out for a while.  it felt really nice !  i did have 2 drinks on my way home.  going to try not to drink anymore today.   i really appreciate all the support ! 

[Armee]

Wow! Fantastic!!!

[rainydiary]

Larry, I'm glad you had a positive experience with working out.  I hope that you find a routine that works for you.

[Larry]

thank you !!    i did have one more drink,  only 3 all day.   i don't know why,  but i feel really good.  now if i could just get some sleep,  but one thing at a time. 

[rainydiary]

Larry, I agree, one thing at a time.  I think we often try to go too big too fast when I am learning that change comes from small adjustments I make consistently over time.  I am glad to hear you had a feel good day. 

[Armee]

I think it is great that you are able to feel proud of and celebrate your success and not get bogged down by the days that don't go as well. That's a really encouraging sign that you are going to do really well in trauma therapy. Because sometimes you'll be feeling confident like you've got this and then somedays it feels like you are back at square 1 and the feeling of discouragement can be hard. You just gotta pick yourself up and keep trudging and you'll see you didn't land back at square 1,  you just paused or fell back one or two squares.

Congrats on stopping at 3! Sleep will improve with time. I highly recommend a weighted blanket when you have the funds and courage to explain to your wife why she gets to sleep under a 20 pound blanket! 😁