Learning to heal, Larry's journey

[NarcKiddo]

 

[Larry]

I played pickleball again today,  over 40 people were there,  they are all really nice,  it's nice to meet new people and have some fun.  Hoping to get to the gym later today.  Things have been mostly good so far this week,  I was concerned about loosing the therapist i have been seeing since may.  There is another therapist i have seen a few times,  i might try to schedule something with her. 

[Blueberry]

Glad you had fun Larry   

[Larry]

thank you blueberry,
I drank too much yesterday,  i don't know why,  but it usually leads to negative thoughts and feelings.   I called the hotline 2 times last night,   i feel like i should know better,  this has happened too many times. 

[Armee]

A lot of people with complex trauma...myself included...have different parts of our brain that are active at different times and are pretty separated from the other parts of our brain. So even though we might "know" things in one moment doesn't mean we have access to that knowledge at other times when other parts are activated. Please don't be too hard on yourself. Sometimes I need to write stuff down where multiple parts can find them and know what to do.

[NarcKiddo]

I think Armee is spot on. There are many occasions where I have done something that has me saying later "I should know better". But in the moment, I didn't. I guess I was just doing what I needed to do in that moment to survive, and I guess that is probably what you were doing too. The good thing is that you are thinking about it afterwards, and recognising why it is not helpful. All of that will eventually help you avoid the unhealthy coping mechanisms. But in the meantime you have to cope somehow, so please don't be hard on yourself if you slip up.

[Blueberry]

I agree with NK and Armee. 

[sanmagic7]

 

[Larry]

thank you everyone !    I have been doing good the last few days.   trying to stay active and have been working a lot.   today is day 5 without a drink.   I haven't seen day 5 in a while.   I am trying to stay focused on my health and fitness. 

[Armee]

Wow great reset Larry! Way to go congrats to day 5!

[Larry]

thank you armee !   today is day 7 !!   it feels really good to say that.   I had a great gym session yesterday,  going again tomorrow after playing pickleball.   the last week has been good,  i hope i can keep it going

[Armee]

Minute by minute! Congrats! Day 7!!

[NarcKiddo]

Day 7! Good for you, Larry. I am so glad you are enjoying the gym and the pickleball.

[Larry]

feeling depressed and lonely today.   I am trying to get motivated,  but i just want to hide from everyone

[Armee]

I like hiding from everyone. It's my favorite past-time. 


But im sorry you are feeling lonely and depressed.