Can’t think, feeling numb

[Skyblue6]

Hi, I think maybe I keep dissociating today but I'm not sure.  I have dissociated before but not always in the same way.
Earlier I was triggered, started having flashbacks in form of intrusive images and emotional flashback. It felt too much emotionally so I tried to shut it out of my mind. I struggled to ground but did eventually through focusing on my breathing. But on and off since whenever I stop and my mind isn't busy, i start to feel triggered and it's like my mind can't handle it and it's trying to keep the thoughts/emotions out. My mind goes blank, I can't think, in a way I feel numb. It's like two separate parts in my mind. Part is on autopilot so can get on with things but other part is far aware and numb and I can't/don't want to access what's there as emotionally feels like it will be too much. It's so weird and exhausting.

[Armee]

It is really exhausting and we can climb out and be sucked back in over and over again. The thing that seem to work the best for me if I can manage it is getting out and exercising for awhile.

I'm sorry you are being flooded with intrusive images and feelings. 

[Skyblue6]

Thank you Armee. I did feel better when I went out for a walk and was talking to others. It was back at home it was difficult again.