Well, that's quite interesting...

[CactusFlower]

Doing some more Inner Child work lately and discovered one is a boy, about 9 and 3/4. (he insisted he's almost 10. I am AFAB (assigned female at birth) and identify as non-binary. I used to joke for years that I had an "inner pre-teen boy" because I liked the humor of things like Beavis and Butthead, dumb fart jokes, that kind of thing. Maybe I subconsciously knew and could only deal with it like that. I also found out he's been the "protector" of my younger ICs, little girls about 7 and 4. He hasn't named himself yet, but trust takes work. He's definitely talkative in my writings, that's for sure. The more I learn, the more things make sense.

[rainydiary]

Thank you for sharing this and also resonate with the feeling that the more we learn can help make sense of things. 

[Kizzie]

I agree with Rainy CactusFlower. Sharing things like this does help make sense of things so thank you. It highlights the importance of acknowledging, listening to, validating and loving the different parts of us rather than pushing them away/down.   

[paul72]

Thank you for sharing this CactusFlower
I am so nervous trying to communicate with my inner child. Your sharing really helps me not be so afraid.

[CactusFlower]

If you'd like to try my technique, Phil, feel free. not everything works for everyone, but I'm glad I can help inspire you!

I have a notebook and I draw a line down the middle of a page. left column is my Inner Parent and right is the Inner Child. I write on the left and start by thanking them for talking to me, telling them I love them and I'm here to listen.  Then I start to ask questions, and just let whatever wants to come out be on the right. Spelling errors, different handwriting, it's fascinating. My littlest even holds the pen differently. In each session, I do ask "Is there anything you want to tell me?", and it often brings up very interesting things. Feel free to use this method if it works for you. I find my ICs want to talk, but trust has to be established first that I will actually listen.

[paul72]

thank you CactusFlower
I will try that...
This is all brand new to me.... likely talking to my little self for the first time (last week?) has probably made him want to come out.
I need to welcome this instead of being afraid. He told me he was angry with me... that was enough to make me want to run.
But I want my little guy to feel safe and happy.
I've read through almost all of the threads here today on this topic for the first time too... I have a lot to learn, but that's ok.
Much gratitude for the advice and sharing

[Hope67]

I have a notebook and I draw a line down the middle of a page. left column is my Inner Parent and right is the Inner Child. I write on the left and start by thanking them for talking to me, telling them I love them and I'm here to listen.  Then I start to ask questions, and just let whatever wants to come out be on the right. Spelling errors, different handwriting, it's fascinating. My littlest even holds the pen differently. In each session, I do ask "Is there anything you want to tell me?", and it often brings up very interesting things. Feel free to use this method if it works for you. I find my ICs want to talk, but trust has to be established first that I will actually listen.

Hi Cactusflower,
I like the sound of your technique, thank you so much for sharing it. 

Hope 

[CactusFlower]

Working with this IC has been very enlightening and of course, sad in some places. But it has definitely explained a lot about aspects of my personality. I also find this young boy to be very funny at times and quite witty. It's also fascinating to see that he holds some concealed anger at the abuser. We'll talk more about that when he's ready to. I knew IC work would be complex, but this is.... wow, so may layers of stuff to unpack.

[paul72]

Best wishes as you continue your IC work CactusFlower ... it sounds awesome and I am so thankful you are sharing it here.
I've had my paper with the line drawn in the middle in front of me since you suggested it .... When the time is right, I'll be ready

[Not Alone]

CactusFlower, greetings to you and your inner children. 

[CactusFlower]

groupwave!  lol