Ozark and the Covert N

[Kizzie]

My H and I watched the end of the TV series Ozark the other night and I was quite stoked they included a character who is a stealth or covert N.  He was the father of the female lead and a Christian or at least he was cloaked as a one.  He looked like a kind, loving person but In the last part of the show he was revealed for what he was, an abusive drunk who cheated on his wife and treated his daughter and son terribly growing up.

At some point in his life he hid his true character by joining a church group and eating up the respect and care they provided him with.  He had convinced them he was a stellar person and had almost convinced his grandchildren their mother was the devil incarnate but then he was shown for what he was. They realized why she behaved as she did and that she had every right to be angry with their grandfather. 

I really related to it as my M in particular was a covert N and played the good mother, aunt, wife, sister....  I always felt like I was the bad person any time I tried to speak up about her.  I gave up and still to this day here is about the only place I talk about what it was and is like. I don't know if my son truly knows how bad it was for me but he watched the show so part of me hopes he connected the dots from the few things I've said over the years.  At some point though I'd like to be straight and ask him if he does understand. 

Anyway, it gives me hope to see covert N characters in TV and movies more now. 

[Kraggy]

Interesting. I too turn to film and TV sources to study the modus operandi of the coverts and  hidden sociopaths.
Thank you for sharing it. Does H support and validate your  connecting the dots with other stories you saw on there,  as well as your own? Well I am glad you saw it and wrote your thoughts about it here nonetheless..
It can be enlightening perhaps even validating to some extent. Where do you watch "Ozark" Is it a netflix series?
I was watching the newer one called "Stay Sweet" abou the psychopathic led FLDS (fundamentalist cult based originally in Utah) The original pervert and sociopath called "Rulon Jeffs" and his son followed in his footsteps named Warren Jeffs. It is fascinating to hear the interviews from the women who escaped and spoke out about their experiences, although it can be a tad triggery, depending on what your background was. So just a heads up folks watch with caution. It is well done the series, and seems to show the women away from the cult and they appear healthy and their thinking and outlook seem better than being in that fog they were in, during the interviews.
This is a Netflix I believe, just came out this month in fact.
I am the adult child of a sociopathic (covert mother) who is still alive and running rather low on her supply. I am very LC with her. And yet I cannot believe just how much I feel I have in common with those women. When I first watched it I didnt think I would share similar abuse outcomes...but the way the abuses cause the CPTSD , it seems more relatable than I had originally thought it would be. One piece of hope is although the did not catch "Rulon" there was testimony and a few convictions in the courts with the son, Warren. A good sign indeed.

[Kizzie]

I watched Stay Sweet too - very, very chilling and actually quite sickening in parts.  I agree it's a good thing they caught Warren Jeffs and put him away.  I understand he is still running Short Creek from jail though. 

I also recently watched "Under the Banner of Heaven' which was based on true events in Utah. Coincidentally part of it was filmed in the small town where I live in Canada. The message was the same, LDS oppression and abuse of females of all ages, power and control of believers through isolation and threat of not making it to heaven/ostracism, promotion of the idea that believers are the chosen people of the one true God and that their leader is the chosen prophet of God ... 

IMO as long as law enforcement and the courts "step lightly' because they don't want to offend people of a particular faith, whichever one it may be, religious/cult abuse will continue to flourish via mind tricks and manipulation dressed up in goodness and faith that is actually narcissism, like the grandfather in Ozark.